


Transition

by TitansRule



Series: Trials and Tribulations [4]
Category: Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: F/M, Family, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-17
Updated: 2015-03-22
Packaged: 2017-12-05 15:30:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 27,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/724857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TitansRule/pseuds/TitansRule
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The last thing Elena Gilbert remembers is being trapped in a submerged car, her childhood friend, Matt, in the driver’s seat. Her vampire ex-boyfriend, Stefan, reached them and Elena begged him to save Matt’s life before hers. She’s fairly sure he abided by her wishes – but then why is she in a hospital supply closet, still damp, and apparently alive?</p><p>Elena is all too aware that she looks just like Katherine Pierce, the woman who toyed with Stefan’s heart and that of his brother, Damon, in 1864, and she’s all too aware that Stefan thinks she too has fallen for his brother’s charms. But who do you turn to when you’re turning into a monster?<br/>Full details regarding ships inside. No flames please.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a sort-of sequel to my other story, The New Understanding (set after 3x10), but the only thing you need to know is that Damon and Elena talked things through and concluded that, while they loved each other, they weren't in love with each other. So saying, any Delena in this story will be purely friendship, even though they are the main characters (hence the character tags) - the romantic ships will be Stelena and Datherine. If that's not your thing, you know where the 'back' button is; if you want to read anyway, go ahead, but please refrain from ship-bashing in the comments.
> 
> This takes place after the Season 3 finale, with a slight twist in that Dr Fell never told Damon and Stefan that Elena wasn't exactly dead. So they've taken Jeremy and the others home to wait for her body to be released.
> 
> Also, Damon's reaction to Elena turning will be different, because he's not in love with her, so he will be a little OOC. I'm aware of this. I also haven't seen all of the episodes yet, so I apologise for any obvious mistakes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I realise the last thing I need to be doing, given my WIPs, is re-writing finished stories, but this was bugging me (note to self: stop posting first drafts as finished stories!) and I've got the inspiration for once.

Over the last year, Elena Gilbert had become a little too used to being unconscious, but waking up this time felt different.

As always, the first sense that came back online was her hearing, and the first thing she became aware of was that people were shouting.

A lot.

The words weren’t angry, or even distinguishable, but they were _loud_ , and as her consciousness slowly returned, they penetrated Elena’s brains like tiny little screws.

She opened her eyes, ready to snap at them all to _just shut up_ , but the artificial lights seemed unnaturally bright and she squeezed them shut immediately with a pained groan.

The voices dimmed a little, but they didn’t stop, and Elena realised she was alone.

_Where am I? What happened?_

A series of images flashed through her mind as her memory finally kicked in … yelling at Matt … Rebekah … the bridge … Stefan …

Her eyes flew open again with a gasp, causing her to flinch again at the still-too-bright lights, but that was the last thing on her mind right now.

Klaus was dead.

Everything they had been working towards had finally paid off right when it was the last thing they wanted.

Was that the last time she would ever see Stefan? Were her last words to him a plea to save Matt’s life?

And he had.

Her compassionate Stefan, ever the champion for her free will, had saved Matt’s life and honoured her wishes.

Hadn’t he?

Was Matt okay?

Was _she_ okay?

She didn’t seem to be in a hospital – at least, she wasn’t in a hospital _room_.

Now the noise had dimmed and her eyes had adjusted to the light, Elena could fully appreciate just how strange her situation really was.

She was propped up against the wall of what appeared to be a hospital supply closet, still dressed in the mildly damp clothes she had been wearing at the time of the accident. On top the shouting from outside and the bright lights, there was a slightly sweet smell wafting in from the corridor outside, a smell that was unfamiliar but that made her insides ache with hunger.

Taking a shaky breath, Elena struggled to stand, but her legs shook, refusing to take her weight, and she sank back against the wall, a sob bubbling up in her throat. She wanted to believe this was all a strange dream, but everything was just too vivid – extremely vivid, right down to the cool metal brushing the hand that rested on the floor from her attempt to push herself upright.

It was a cell phone, but not hers, and it was sitting on a neatly folded sheet of paper. Picking them up, her hands trembling, Elena unfolded the note, finding words that seemed to float off the page and hover in front of her, taunting her and changing her world forever.

_Elena,_

_I am so, so sorry about all of this, and for leaving you to handle this by yourself. Coward I may be, but stupid I am not._

_You have lost so much, Elena, and you have been so strong through it all. You have maturity beyond your years; although you shouldn’t have to deal with any of this, I have no doubt that you can and will pull through._

_I’m afraid I lied the other morning when I told Jeremy you had a concussion. The blow to your head had caused cerebral haemorrhaging, which, as I’m sure you know, is almost always fatal. I took measures to save your life by giving you an injection of Damon Salvatore’s blood._

_I’m afraid I haven’t told your friends about this – I happen to like living, and I have a feeling that telling the Salvatores that I caused you to become a vampire would seriously shorten my life expectancy._

_As far as they are aware, you’re with our medical examiner due to ‘suspicious circumstances and familial connections’. I convinced them to take your boys home._

_Obviously, your cell phone doesn’t work anymore, so I left you mine._

_Please forgive me._

_Doctor Meredith Fell_

Ice crept into Elena’s chest and up to her throat, stealing the breath she no longer needed.

Everything suddenly made sense – made horrible, _horrible_ sense. The loud voices, the brightness of the lights, her elevated confusion, that smell …

_It’s blood._

A whimper tore from her throat as she curled into herself, fumbling with the cell phone. With parents who were so involved with the town, Elena had developed an excellent memory for phone numbers as a young girl, and she had never been so grateful for it than she was right now.

She hurriedly typed in Stefan’s number, her panic mounting with every passing second.

“Come on …” She whispered fervently. “Pick up …”

But the phone rang off without even going to voicemail.

Three more times, Elena tried the number, with increasing desperation, but it was to no avail.

 _Of course he’s not answering the phone_ , a snide voice in her head hissed. _He’s dead. Klaus is dead, remember? The bloodline curse would have killed him._

 _No._ She told herself firmly. _No, don’t think like that. Meredith obviously saw them earlier._

 _Sage and Troy were fine until they came to kill Stefan._ The voice reminded her darkly. _Maybe it takes a while._

Tears streaming down her face, Elena dialled another number, not caring about the illogical nature of her actions, just instinctively resorting to the one person that had always been there over the last few months.

All she knew was that there was blood on the other side of that door, and she wanted it.

Elena closed her eyes, silently chanting the same words over and over again. _I can’t hurt anyone. I won’t hurt anyone._

Her internal monologue was interrupted, not by Stefan, but by a voice that was no less music to her ears.

_“You’re interrupting my drinking.”_

A sob forced its way through Elena’s lips, heightened relief breaking her composure. “Damon!”

Instantly, Damon’s voice changed, his lazy drawl covering up all manner of emotion vanishing, becoming sharp and alert. _“Katherine!”_

“No, it’s Elena … I’m at the hospital, Damon; I’m alive – I need help, I’m in a supply closet, and something’s wrong and …”

 _“Alright, Elena, calm down!”_ Damon interrupted. _“Try and breathe, nice and evenly for me, alright?”_

Forcing herself to stop rambling, Elena sucked in a shaky breath and let it out slowly. It calmed her down, but only a little.

 _“Good girl.”_ Damon said soothingly. _“Do you want me to get Stefan?”_

Elena hesitated. It had been Stefan’s number she had originally dialled, but … recently, dealing with Stefan had been more stressful than she felt she could handle right now. “I don’t know … I thought so, but … I kinda need my best friend.”

_“Okay. Know where I can find one of them?”_

A sad smile touched her face as she rested her head back against the wall, her body unclenching a little. “Probably drinking himself into a coma in his living room. Unless he hates me for leaving him to die alone.”

There was a pause on the other end of the phone, and Elena’s heart skipped a beat, but then Damon spoke again. _“Never. Just hang on, Elena. I’m on my way.”_

The phone rang off before she could respond, and Elena continued to breathe heavily, clutching the phone to her chest like it was the only thing keeping her grounded.

She tried to remember everything Stefan had told Caroline after her transition about controlling the bloodlust.

_“Breathe through it. You’re stronger than it. Breathe through it.”_

Although … was it bloodlust she was feeling?

The smell wafting in from the other side of the door was intoxicating, definitely, but she wasn’t getting the urge to rip the hospital apart for it.

A hand rattled at the doorknob, and Elena froze, her breath catching, but in the next second, a low familiar voice said, “Elena?”

“I’m here.” Elena whispered, knowing he could hear her. “I’m in here.”

With a little more force than maybe was necessary, Damon broke the door open, his eyes alighting on her immediately. “Elena …”

Contrary to popular belief, Damon and Elena had in fact discussed their relationship, several times for that matter, but it came with the understanding that it remained implicit at all times.

She had already broken the unwritten rules of their friendship on the phone, but it seemed they were throwing the rules out of the window today.

Letting the door swing shut, he crossed the floor to where she was pressed against the wall, pale-faced and trembling, reaching out to touch her face.

“Elena, are you alright?” He asked urgently. “Meredith said you were … Christ, Elena, Ric just dropped, and I thought you were …” He pulled her into his arms, pressing a kiss to her head. “I thought we’d lost you.”

“You did.” Elena sniffled, clinging to him. “You did lose me. It wasn’t a concussion; she used your blood to heal me, and then I died. There’s a letter on the floor somewhere.”

“What the …?” Damon muttered, rescuing the note, his eyes darkening as they travelled down the page. “I’m sorry, Lena.”

“Why?” Elena asked, pulling away from him to wipe her eyes. “I thought this was what you wanted.”

Damon sighed in a way she knew meant he was trying to keep his temper for her sake. “I’m not gonna lie and say the thought of watching you grow old and die was a cheerful one, and I know what happened before the sacrifice. But I didn’t get it back then, Lena. I do now. And I would have watched, Elena – we _both_ would – if that was what you wanted. You’re right. I’m not sorry I’m not going to have to lose you, Elena, but I am sorry this choice was taken away from you.”

“I know.” Elena whispered, hugging her knees to her chest. “I’m scared, Damon.”

“I know.” Damon repeated, dropping to sit beside her. “I know you are.”

“I can smell it.” Elena continued, whimpering slightly. “And I want it so badly …”

“Of course you do.” Damon murmured, pulling her closer. “You’re becoming a vampire, sweetheart. Of course you want blood.”

“I don’t want to hurt anyone!” Elena protested, tucking her head into the crook of his neck. “Can’t I do what Stefan does?”

“What, the bunny diet?” Damon asked, distaste evident in his voice. “If you want, although I wouldn’t recommend it. You’re jumping ahead of yourself though, Elena. You’re still in transition – you need human blood to complete it.”

“From the vein?” Elena asked shakily.

“No, it can be from a blood-bag.” Damon said, stroking her hair. “But you … you don’t have to, Elena. No one’s gonna force you to transition.”

Coming from a man who had once forced vampire blood down her throat against her will to keep her alive whether she liked it or not (she didn’t), it was a huge statement, and Elena felt her heart swell with affection for her best friend. “If I don’t,” she said, feeling him stiffen against her, “will you stay with me?”

Damon hesitated, but nodded against her head. “Of course. I won’t even tell the others, if you don’t want me to. It’ll be our secret; they’d never need to know.”

“I wouldn’t ask that of you.” Elena said softly. “It wouldn’t be fair. What about if I _do_ transition? What happens then?”

“You know what happens.” Damon said. “We get you used to being a vampire; help you control the bloodlust.”

“And I wouldn’t have to drink human blood ever again?” Elena asked.

Damon sighed. “I’d love to say no and convince you to transition, but that would be a lie and you’d hate me for it …”

Elena made a soft noise of protest but didn’t interrupt.

“Stefan would tell you that you don’t.” Damon continued. “And maybe he’s right, I don’t know. All I know is that … avoiding it won’t stop the cravings. If I were you, I’d at least learn how to feed and hunt safely, and that way you know that you won’t have an accident if you don’t have any other choice. But _if_ you transition, it’s up to you. It’s your choice.”

Elena looked up at his face, seeing the rigid set of his jaw and the distance in his eyes. “Thank you.”

“For what?” Damon asked.

“For letting me make that choice.” Elena elaborated. “I know that your instinct is to just force me to transition and keep me around; you’ve got eternity to earn forgiveness after all. It means a lot to me that you’re willing to step back, no matter how hard it is.”

“Don’t get used to it.” Damon muttered. “I’m not my brother. You have too much faith in me sometimes.”

“I’m your best friend.” Elena reminded him, smiling softly. “Of course I have faith in you. One of us has to.”

Damon smirked weakly and checked his phone. “Elena, I don’t want to rush you, but you need to make a decision. You were out for a long time. You don’t have long left.”

Elena closed her eyes. People and places seemed to swim through her mind, her life – as clichéd as it seemed – flashing before her eyes.

She saw her parents in the front seats of the car as the water slowly crept up towards their shoulders.

She saw Jenna, her eyes dark with blood, her neck snapping under Klaus’s hands.

She saw John, lying on her kitchen floor, blood seeping from the wound in his stomach.

She saw Isobel, pulling her daylight necklace from her body, burning in the sun with a terrible scream.

She saw Jeremy, reloading a crossbow with a stake and lopping the head off of a hybrid with a meat knife.

She saw Bonnie screaming as her mother’s neck was snapped.

She saw Caroline killing her mother’s deputies to save the Salvatores, blood staining her mouth like the berries they had picked as children.

She saw Tyler fighting to break the sire bond, his distraught expression at realising he had bitten Caroline.

She saw Matt’s face crumple with hurt and betrayal as she told him the truth about Vicki.

She saw Damon, collapsing under her embrace after finding out Katherine had abandoned him, labouring under the agony of Tyler’s bite, begging her to kill him, standing sentry outside her house, watching over her and protecting her family.

And she saw Stefan, every perfect, wonderful moment she had spent with him and every second of the nightmares that the summer had produced.

Stefan’s unending compassion meant that his behaviour around her since his emotions had completely returned had been cautious. He had followed every unwritten rule, every subconscious message she sent. He had stayed away when she needed space and let her cling to him when she needed closeness.

But still, their relationship remained strained.

Whether he truly believed her to be in love with Damon or whether he had convinced himself that she _should_ have fallen in love with the man who remained by her side while he himself left a trail of body parts along the East Coast, she didn’t know.

What she _did_ know was that there were only so many times she could tell him that she wasn’t in love with Damon.

If she completed the transition, she and Stefan could have eternity together, which was the only thing she could think of that would make the bloodlust even remotely bearable …

But did Stefan want that?

 _Had he ever?_ A nasty little voice said at the back of her mind. _He never even broached the subject of you turning. Maybe vampire-Elena is just too close to Katherine._

Elena screwed her eyes tightly shut, her fingernails digging into the palms of her clenched fists, the pain almost silencing the voice in her head.

“Easy, Elena.” Damon soothed, taking her hands in his and gently uncurling her fingers. “What are you thinking?”

“Stefan.” Elena whispered. “And Katherine.”

For whatever reason, Damon had never needed many words to understand what was going on in her head, and his eyes darkened.

“You could _never_ be Katherine, Elena.” He said softly. “You share a face, not a heart, or a mind, or a soul. That’s not how the doppelganger spell works.”

Elena sniffed. “That’s not what Isobel’s friend seemed to think.”

“Yeah, well, she tried to kill you.” Damon said with a scowl. “She doesn’t get a vote.”

Elena gave a reluctant giggle. “Damon, you can’t invalidate academics just because you don’t like them.”

Damon smirked at her. “Yeah, I can. There’s that smile.”

Said smile faded and Elena dropped her gaze. “Even if I could never be Katherine, what if Stefan can’t love me like this? What if he’s using us as an excuse because he meant what he said in Chicago? What if …?”

“Elena.” Damon interrupted. “First of all, Stefan loves you. Never doubt that. Second of all, if he reacts like that, I’ll rip his heart out. Third, if you’re going to transition, do it for you, not for Stefan. Or anyone else for that matter.”

“That’s not how it works, Damon.” Elena said tiredly. “No man is an island and all that. I can’t make this decision without considering how it’s going to affect the people around me. Bonnie took Caroline’s turning really badly, Caroline had to deal with her father deciding not to transition after Ric …” Her mouth snapped shut and she turned a horrified look on to Damon. “Oh, God, Ric! He’s dead!”

Damon winced, pulling her close again. “Yeah, Elena, he is.” He sighed. “Look, Lena, I hate to rush you, sweetheart, but I need an answer.”

Elena swallowed hard, but her voice held no indecision. “Jeremy just lost the last parent we had left. I can’t leave him too. I want to transition.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the interest in the last chapter. Here's part 2!

****_“Elena?” Damon prompted. “I need an answer.”_

_Elena took a deep breath. “I want to …”_

“I want to feed, Damon.” Elena finished shakily. “I don’t want to die.” She needed to know for sure what was going on between her and Stefan, and, besides, she couldn't leave Jeremy.

Not yet, not like this.

Damon let out a relieved sigh, his face breaking into a smile. “Wait here, I’ll get you a bag.”

As he slipped out, Elena let her head fall back against the wall. She wasn’t as horrified with the prospect of being a vampire as she thought she would be – or, indeed, as she had been back when Damon had forced her to drink his blood before the sacrifice.

Now it was actually happening, it didn't seem that scary.

Yet.

Damon was back before she could really contemplate this, holding two blood bags. Her fingers twitched at the sight, eliciting a grin from her best friend. “One at a time.” He told her, setting one of them down on a shelf.

“What if someone comes in?” Elena asked, her eyes fixed on the blood bag Damon was opening.

“They won’t.” Damon assured her. “I blocked off this corridor and compelled a security guard.” He pushed the blood bag into her hand, and she took a cautious sip.

It didn’t taste like blood she remembered from biting her tongue or cutting her finger. The coppery taste had disappeared, leaving a slightly sweet, slightly tangy flavour that seemed to hum through her entire body, and she drank hungrily, desperately, needing to get as much as possible.

A sudden pain seared through her gums, and she released the now-empty bag, gasping in shock.

“That’s just your fangs, Elena.” Damon said soothingly. “Nothing to worry about.”

One hand flew to her face, tracing the raised veins under her eyes. “What do I …?”

Damon retrieved his phone from his pocket and pulled up the camera, switching the viewer and turning the screen towards her. “See for yourself. It’s not a mirror, but it’ll do.”

Elena stared at her own face with morbid fascination. Her skin was pale, her eyes were blacker than the darkest night, the veins around her eyes were almost bubbling beneath the surface of her skin, her teeth had lengthened and, much to her embarrassment, she had bloodstains all around her mouth. “Oh God …”

“Hey,” Damon slipped the phone away and handed her a tissue. “It’s okay.”

“I should be able to control myself.” Elena muttered, wiping the blood from her mouth. “Caroline killed someone when she turned, Damon, what if …?”

“We’re not going to let you kill someone, Elena.” Damon said. “It’s pretty much inevitable that you’ll try, but we’re not going to let you, okay? You want another one?”

Elena nodded, staring at the floor. “I don’t want to, but I do.”

“Elena, if you keep feeling bad about your natural instincts, you’re gonna drive yourself crazy.” Damon said bluntly, though not unkindly. “Just drink, and then we can get you home.”

“Boarding house.” Elena requested, taking the bag and drinking deeply. Thankfully, the urge didn’t seem as strong this time around and she could drink it more slowly. “I don’t feel ready to be around Jeremy on my own yet.”

“Everyone’s at the boarding house.” Damon warned her. “I tried to find Stefan before I left, but …” His phone went off in his pocket, and he glanced at the screen. “Speak of the devil. What?” He answered.

 _“Where the hell are you?”_ Stefan’s voice demanded. _“Jeremy’s about to lose it, he’s demanding we go and get Elena now.”_

“No need, brother.” Damon answered. “She’s not dead.”

There was a pause of about ten seconds, then … _“You’re drunk, aren’t you? Seriously, Damon? Today of all days?”_

“I am not drunk.” Damon said, rolling his eyes, putting the phone on speaker. “Elena’s right here. Say hello, Elena.”

“He’s telling the truth, Stefan.” Elena said softly. “I’m here.”

The relief in Stefan’s voice was evident even over the phone. _“Elena … You’re okay? You’re alive?”  
_

“Okay, yes.” Damon answered for her. “Alive, not really.”

_“What?”_

“Our lovely Dr Fell decided to use my blood when Elena came in for that concussion earlier today. Yesterday.” Damon corrected. “Elena died with it in her system.”

 _“I’m on my way.”_ Stefan said immediately. _“Don’t do anything drastic, Elena; we’ll find a way out of this.”_

“There was no way out of it, Stefan.” Damon argued. “Drink or die, there is no third option and you know it.”

 _“We’ll find one.”_ Stefan insisted.

“Too late.” Damon said. “How’s the blood, beautiful?”

Elena gave him a dirty look at the endearment. It was hardly going to help. “You’re not funny. I made my choice, Stefan.”

_“Damon, what did you do?!”  
_

“I didn’t do anything!” Damon insisted. “She knew the choice, Stefan. I didn’t force her into anything, did I?”

“He didn’t, Stefan.” Elena agreed. “He was a perfect gentleman. For once.”

Damon pulled a face at her. “Stefan, she made her decision; what we need to do now is …”

_“You should have found another way, Damon.”_

“Dammit, Stefan, there is no other way!” Damon snapped. “You know that as well as I do. It’s done.”

_“Damon, she’s not supposed to be this way!”_

Elena felt something inside of her break at the words, her eyes filling with tears. It was strangely comforting to know that she could still cry.

Damon caught sight of her tears before she could hide them, and his eyes darkened. “Newsflash, brother, she _is_ this way and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. So get your head outta your ass – she needs you.”

 _“No, Damon, she needs you.”_ Stefan disagreed, his voice heavy. _“It’s not my place anymore. She loves you and you know it. Just … take care of her, alright?”_

Damon hung up, pinching the bridge of his nose. “That went well.”

“He hates me.” Elena sobbed.

“No, no, he doesn’t.” Damon said hastily, dropping to sit beside her again. “Elena …”

“He hates me.”

Damon sighed, pulling her on to his lap. She curled up against him, her tears soaking his shirt, and he stroked her hair silently. He knew from experience that when Elena was this upset, there was nothing he could say to comfort her. Her body shook with sobs, and he took the opportunity to call the one person he knew would know a) what Elena was going through, b) how Elena would want him to handle things and c) what to do about his brother.

_“Hello?”_

Damon took a deep breath. “Hello Caroline.”

 _“What do you want, Damon?”_ She asked, her voice choked with tears. _“Tyler’s dead, Elena’s dead … and since when do you call me Caroline and not Barbie or Blondie, so some other stupid …”_

“Elena’s not dead.” Damon interrupted. “Listen.”

 _“She’s crying.”_ Caroline concluded almost immediately. _“What did you do?”_

“Nothing.” Damon said, rolling her eyes. “Stefan’s being a dick, which seems to be his default setting lately.”

 _“You’re one to talk.”_ She retorted.

Damon bit back a chuckle. He’d never admit it, but he liked Caroline. When she first turned, he’d wanted to kill her, not for the sake of being cruel, as Elena had seemed to think, but more to be kind. He was certain that such a vibrant, bubbly, _perky_ girl would never be able to cope with the sudden lifestyle change, but vampirism had done wonders for Caroline, even if all her neurotic behaviour had suddenly been amplified.

“She’s a vampire, Barbie.” He said seriously.

_“Stop calling me that! I didn’t say …”_

“No, not you!” Damon said, rolling his eyes. “Elena’s a vampire.”

There was a silence, longer than anything with Stefan, and he fought not to break it.

_“Shit.”_

“Succinctly put.” Damon said dryly. “Don’t ask how, it’s a long story. I promise I didn’t do anything. I just told Stefan and he went off the deep end because he’s worried about her and he knows she never wanted this, but now she’s convinced he doesn’t love her anymore, and I don’t know what to do.”

 _“Let me get this straight.”_ Caroline said, amusement lacing her voice. _“You, Damon Salvatore, are calling me, Caroline Forbes, and asking for advice.”_

“Dammit, Caroline, this is important!” Damon snapped, immediately softening his tone when Elena flinched against him. “She’s almost hysterical. My instincts are telling me to get her out of town, but I really don’t want to make this worse.”

 _“I can’t tell you what to do, Damon.”_ Caroline said, the laughter vanishing from her voice. _“It needs to be Elena’s decision. You know that. I’ll handle Stefan; he’s been ridiculous ever since he got back. Put her on the phone please?”_

“Hang on.” Damon moved the phone away from him and gently squeezed Elena’s shoulder. “Lena, Caroline wants to talk to you.”

Elena lifted her head, still crying softly, and held out her hand for the phone. “Care?”

 _“Hey sweetie.”_ Caroline said softly. _“How are you doing?”_

“Terrible.” Elena choked out. “He hates me, Caroline!”

 _“Elena Miranda Gilbert, you listen to me and you listen good.”_ Caroline said firmly. _“Stefan does not hate you – he loves you. He loves you so much he’s willing to let you go because he thinks that’s what you want.”_

“But it’s not what I want!” Elena protested, her sobs subsiding.

 _“I know, hon, and I’ll talk to him.”_ Caroline said soothingly. _“In the meantime, what do you need? The first few days are the worst, Elena; it gest better. How can we make it better?”_

Elena thought for a second, but the answer was obvious. “I need my best friend. My _other_ best friend … that’s not Bonnie.”

 _“Elena …”_ Caroline said slowly. _“Are you sure spending more time with Damon is the right thing to do?”_

“You asked me what _I_ needed.” Elena reminded her. “Me. Not Stefan. I love Stefan, Care, but right now we’re not in a good place. I … I need him, Caroline. There’s nothing between us, on either part. You believe me, don’t you?”

Caroline sighed. _“Yeah, Elena, I believe you. I’ll talk to Stefan. Do what you need to do, just … be safe. Alright?”_

“I will.” Elena whispered. “Thanks, Care.”

 _“Put Damon back on.”_ Caroline said.

Elena handed the phone back, and Damon took it cautiously. “Well?”

 _“Listen to her.”_ Caroline instructed. _“Be the man she obviously believes you can be. And don’t you dare make me regret trusting you with this, because if you do, I will hunt you down and I will remind you of the advantage of anger over age.”_

“Got it …” Damon began to respond, but the phone rang off before he could. “Okay, looks like it’s you and me, Elena. How do you want to play this?”

“Can we get out of this hospital?” Elena asked. “The smell of blood’s making me edgy.”

“Sure, it’s dark out.” Damon agreed. Helping her to her feet, he let them out of the closet and into the corridor.

The smell was stronger out here, and Elena forced herself to breathe through her mouth to avoid taking in more than she could help.

“You okay?” Damon asked.

“I think so.” Elena replied shakily. “Let’s just get out of here.”

As they left the closed-off corridor, Damon released the compulsion on the security guard, who looked vaguely confused and wandered away. “Nearest exit’s down here.” He murmured, leading her down the hall.

At that moment, the doors ahead of them burst open and a team of doctors and paramedics rushed through, hurrying a patient towards what must have been an operating room.

The woman seemed to have been in a bad accident – she was barely conscious and covered with blood.

Elena’s legs buckled as the scent hit her, and she felt her face begin to change again. In a split-second, Damon had swung her into his arms, hiding her face in his chest. “Alright, sweetheart,” he said, loud enough for those passing to hear, but quiet enough that it didn’t seem intentional. “That’s enough hurt people for one day. Let’s get you home.”

One of the unneeded paramedics held the door open for them. “She okay?”

“She’s fine.” Damon told her with a charming smile. “Long day, and hospital visits upset her. You’ll forget we were even here.”

“I’ll forget you were even here.” The woman agreed absently, ignoring their departure.

Elena moved her head slightly when they got outside, revelling in blood-free air, but she didn’t release her tight grip on his shirt until he set her on her feet.

“Can you stand?” He asked in a low voice.

“I think so.” Elena said shakily. “Are we … Did you drive here?” She asked, realising they were standing beside his car.

Damon smiled slightly. “No, I left it here earlier. When Caroline and Bonnie made us leave, I ran home rather than drive. Wanted to keep an eye on Stefan. He was distraught.”

“How’s Matt?” Elena asked in a quiet voice.

Damon scowled. “He’s fine. I still don’t understand why Stefan saved him over you.”

“Because I asked him to.” Elena answered. “I begged him to.”

“Why?” Damon asked, sounding bewildered.

Elena sighed, leaning against his car. “Because I couldn’t lose someone else, Damon. Lately, it’s seemed like life’s just one long funeral. Mom and Dad, Jenna, Ric … even if Ric didn’t technically … but he did, didn’t he? When I did?”

Damon nodded, jaw clenched. “I was with him. I knew that it meant you … I got back here as fast as I could, praying that I was wrong. Thank God I was.”

Elena smiled slightly, but it didn’t last long. “If Klaus sired your bloodline …”

“I’d be dead by now.” Damon said bluntly. “Like I said, you were out for a long time.”

“No, I mean, in the car.” Elena explained. “If Klaus sired your bloodline, I was about to lose you, Stefan and Caroline. I’d already lost Tyler. I couldn’t cope with losing Matt as well. If it had been you in that lake …”

“I would have ignored you and dragged you from the car first.” Damon finished. “In a heartbeat, no question. Because I wouldn’t have considered the pain you were about to go through, because the only thing that would matter to me would be that you were alive. But Stefan did, because he loves you in a way I don’t.”

“But you do love me.” Elena said softly.

Damon smirked. “Of course I love you, Lena. You’re my best friend, you’re all I’ve got.”

“You have Stefan.” Elena disagreed.

Damon sighed. “Stefan and I haven’t really had each other since 1864, Elena. Until we got back here … you’ve brought us closer than we have been since we were human.”

“Maybe it’s time you two talked.” Elena suggested.

“Yeah, cause that’ll happen.” Damon muttered.

Elena sniffed slightly, deciding to change the subject. “You can help me, right? What happened in there …”

“Was unusual, at best.” Damon pointed out. “And very bad timing. Yes, I can help you. You heard what I said to Caroline, right? What’s your take on it?”

Elena took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Will I be safe with you?”

Damon frowned slightly. “Yes, of course.”

Elena folded her arms, a slight smile tugging at her lips. “Do you promise not to do that mind control thing with me?”

Damon’s frown deepened, this time with confusion. “Only Originals can … Oh.” His face cleared, as he remembered the harried exchange on a lonely road in Georgia. “Yes.”

Elena’s smile widened. “Can I trust you?”

Damon grinned at her. “Get in the car.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully an explanation of Damon's somewhat OOC behaviour around Elena. Also (strong) mentions of Stelena and Datherine.

“So where are we going?” Elena asked, once they’d pulled on to the main road.

“Wherever you want.” Damon answered breezily. “World’s your oyster and all that.”

“I don’t have a change of clothes.” Elena pointed out.

“Then we’ll go shopping tomorrow.” Damon said. “I’ve got an idea.”

“Where are we going?” Elena repeated.

“Lake-house.” Damon told her. “Ours, not yours.”

“I didn’t know you _had_ a lake-house.” Elena remarked.

“That’s because Stefan doesn’t really know about it.” Damon explained. “As a family, we had a couple of properties, but since I was the eldest son …”

“You were the one who was expected to know about them.” Elena finished understandingly. “Has Stefan ever been there?”

Damon shrugged. “I don’t know. Father might’ve taken him while I was away. I never told Stefan about it, it was kind of our place.”

Elena’s brow creased thoughtfully. From what she had gathered, Damon never got along with their father, and she knew their mother had died when Stefan was very young. “Whose?”

“Mine and … Katherine’s.” Damon said, after a short hesitation. “We sort of ran away for a few days.”

“Just a few days?” Elena asked, trying to keep the sympathy from her voice.

“We both knew it couldn’t last long.” Damon said with a shrug. “I was the soldier on leave – I wasn’t supposed to be chasing girls. It was supposed to be Stefan … It was always Stefan.”

“She did love you.” Elena said, gazing at her lap. “She told me … when she brought the cure. She said it was okay to love you both, because she did.”

“She wouldn’t have been talking about love in the emotional sense, Elena, trust me.” Damon said bitterly. “Doesn’t know the meaning of the word.”

Elena shrugged, but didn’t argue. Damon knew Katherine better than she did, after all.

Katherine’s actions when it came to the Salvatore brothers were a mystery to Elena in general, and she had long since written off any hope of understanding them. The two Petrov descendants simply did not think the same, and for Elena to have any hope of understanding Katherine’s motives would take more energy than she could be bothered to spare.

All the same, it did puzzle Elena why Katherine would come back into town, with Klaus on her heels, and make such an obvious play for Stefan. Surely, if she loved Stefan as much as she claimed, she wouldn’t put such a large target on his head – the Originals had made no secret of the fact that they would threaten those Elena cared about to get what they wanted.

They had already killed Katherine’s family to get revenge, so why wouldn’t they go after Stefan to get to her?

She didn’t bother asking Damon this, though. While Damon had insisted, after Katherine had rejected him once and for all, that he hated her and wanted nothing to do with her, Elena knew he still loved her, as was proven when Katherine admitted that she knew using the dagger to kill Elijah would kill Damon.

Damon had reacted with anger and cold hatred, but Elena had seen the pain he had tried to mask and the alcohol/blood binge that had followed.

What really confused Elena was that she had confronted Katherine on this point before Damon had, and she had seen the shock and horror in Katherine’s eyes when she realised what daggering the Original could have done to her former lover.

_And if she didn’t know, why tell Damon that she did?_

Again, Elena had never voiced this question to Damon. She knew that Katherine was the very Queen of Manipulation, and she would never forgive herself if she inadvertently helped the older woman play her best friend.

“So how far is it?” Elena asked, changing the subject.

“Not far.” Damon assured her. “I want you to go ahead and take a nap.” He told her, his voice soft and hypnotic. “Your energy levels are hell for the first few days.”

“I’m not tired.” Elena murmured, her eyes fluttering shut of their own accord, betraying her.

As Elena dozed off beside him, Damon kept one eye on her, feeling increasingly worried. Although it was instinct for a vampire to seek out their sire after turning, it could normally be overridden by other bonds, and that Elena had not then asked him to get Stefan once she’d got hold of him was worrying him.

His suggestion that she sleep was little more than a test for the thought that had been niggling at the back of his mind – a thought that was so obscure that he couldn’t work out how it had appeared in his mind to begin with.

When Elena fell asleep almost immediately, he was almost certain he was right. Not that Elena wasn’t tired – she was – but she wasn’t tired enough to fall asleep that fast – almost on command.

Checking once more that her breathing had evened out, he dialled Bonnie’s number, unsurprised when it went straight to voicemail.

“Good evening, Miss Bennett.” He said. “Before you delete this message immediately, let me assure you that I would not be doing this unless it was necessary, believe me. I need you to do me a favour and find a way to break a sire bond. Not entirely sure we need it, but if we do, we need it sooner rather than later. Caroline and Stefan can fill you in on why, I’m sure – they’ll freak out as soon as you mention it, so tell them I’ll be a good boy and we’ll be home before they know it.”

Hanging up, Damon heaved a heavy sigh. If there was a sire bond between him and Elena, he’d have to be careful how he worded things while they were away.

An ironic smile quirked on his lips as he turned off of the main road. Stefan would have a laughing fit at that.

Damon? Careful?

Damon? Caring about how someone handled their transition?

But the truth was, Damon had had just as much trouble with the transition as Stefan had, he’d just ultimately handled it differently.

Stefan had developed an addiction, killing hundreds, but kept his humanity on.

Damon had handled the cravings, but turned his humanity off when the pain of losing Katherine got too much, killing just as many.

Elena’s words in the hospital came back to him. _“I’m your best friend. Of course I have faith in you. One of us has to.”_

Damon had turned his humanity back on for Katherine. Even with his feelings off, his love for her couldn’t be denied. When they discovered that she wasn’t in the cave, he almost turned it back off again, until Stefan had his little relapse.

He knew that Stefan would never believe him, but Damon had genuinely been trying to help him. He’d just failed to take into consideration the fact that helping a relapsed addict was not the same as helping a newbie.

Stefan had later used the fact that he’d stepped in to help Elena with ‘Stefan Detox’ as proof that he had fallen in love with her, after Isobel had opened her big mouth.

How Isobel had known, Damon had no idea – he hadn’t even come to that conclusion himself.

Truthfully, he had stepped in because, promise of eternal misery or not, at the end of the day, Stefan was still his younger brother.

But Elena was definitely the reason he didn’t switch off afterwards. She was like a ray of light in an otherwise dark world, the only person to ever see any glimmer of goodness in him and draw it out like a magnet.

It was no wonder, really, that he had thought himself in love with her.

And then it changed with one kiss.

Because Elena was good, and pure, and warm, and compassionate, and everything that Katherine wasn’t.

But Katherine … was Katherine.

And in spite of everything she had done, and in spite of Damon’s utter loathing for her actions, she still held his unbeating heart in her vice-like grip, crushing it to dust over and over again, probably smirking as she did so.

It would make more sense for him to be in love with Elena, and far less painful.

But then when did he ever take the easy route in life?

Besides, not being in love with her was going to make things far less complicated if he _was_ right about the sire bond.

A sire bond was basically an intrinsic desire to make your sire happy, even if the sire’s wishes weren’t voiced out loud, so if Elena thought – or knew – that Damon was in love with her and that the one thing that would make him happier than anything would be if she felt the same way, the bond could well convince her that her love for him, though platonic, was actually something else.

The worst part was that Damon wasn’t sure, if he _had_ been in love with her, if he would have been able to do the right thing and push her away.

God knew if Katherine suddenly offered herself up on a platter again …

Actually, scratch that, she had, and he’d been able to push her away.

Maybe he had more self-control than he gave himself credit for.

The road changed beneath them from tarmac to dirt, causing the ride to become a little bumpier. Elena stirred, but didn’t wake, and he couldn’t help the fond smile that crossed his face. It surprised him how much he could love her, without actually being in love with her, and it suddenly occurred to him that this was how Stefan felt about Caroline … and how he must have felt about Lexi.

For a long time, Damon had justified the death of his brother’s best friend as ‘for the greater good’. Killing her meant that Sheriff Forbes and the rest of the council would never suspect them and, indeed, he had become a trusted ally.

But if the pain Stefan felt was even a fraction of what Damon had felt when he thought Elena was dead …

Maybe Elena was right about talking to Stefan.

 _Later._ He decided, pulling to a stop outside the cabin. “Wake up, Sleeping Beauty.” He called. “We’re here.”

Sleepily, Elena’s eyes fluttered open, and she stretched lazily. “Guess I’m more tired than I thought.”

“Yeah, about that …” Damon muttered. “Inside, we need to talk.”

“Isn’t that usually my line?” Elena asked, getting out of the car.

Every sense and nerve seemed to be on high-alert, and her eyes darted around her, seeing further into the dim light than would normally have been possible. The noises of the surrounding woodland were louder than they should be, the light breeze caressed her and made her shiver even though it wasn’t too cold, and her entire being seemed to vibrate with energy. “That nap really worked.”

“Yeah, about that …” Damon repeated. “Come on.” He took hold of her arm with uncharacteristic tenderness, or so she thought, until she looked down and saw his fingers digging into her flesh.

“That looks like it should hurt.” Elena remarked. “Do vampires just … not feel pain or something?”

“Depends how much blood we’ve had.” Damon answered shortly, loosening his hold slightly. “And what kind. You only just fed, on human as well, so your tolerance is higher. Also depends on what’s doing the hurting and how new you are. For the first week or so, your body is incredibly sensitive, yet your pain tolerance is incredibly high. Right now, you’re very aware of my grip, but it’s not hurting you.” He opened the door to the cabin and led her inside, before releasing her and disappearing in a blur of movement.

When he finally stilled, all of the thick, heavy curtains were pulled shut, and the lights were on.

“You’ve been here since 1864.” Elena observed, looking around. The décor was more modern than she expected, though not entirely up to date, and the light fittings were electric as opposed to gas.

Damon shrugged. “I came back now and then. Stefan had the Manor, then the Boarding House … I came here.” His eyes lingered on an armchair that seemed older than everything else, before they hardened and he turned to her. “We need to talk.”

“Okay.” Elena agreed slowly, sinking on to the couch. “What is it?”

Instead of sitting beside her, Damon nudged the coffee table forward and perched on the edge, so his knees were touching hers. “I think a sire bond might have formed between us.”

Elena stared at him for a few seconds. “What do you mean? Like the thing between Tyler and Klaus?”

Damon grimaced. “Sort of, yes, but at the same time, no. From what we’ve seen of Klaus’s other hybrids, there’s a sire bond with all of them, which I think has something to do with the hybrid thing. Between vampires, it’s much rarer; there has to be an emotional connection first and even then …”

“So why are you so sure there’s one in this case?” Elena asked.

“It’s more of a hunch.” Damon admitted. “But you called me, and stuck with me …”

“Because you’re my best friend.” Elena put in.

“And you agreed to this little road trip …”

“Because you said you could help me.”

“And you fell asleep in the car instantly.” Damon finished. “I said that I wanted to take you out of town and you let me. I told you I wanted you to take a nap and you did. This is dangerous, Elena. I don’t want you to end up feeding on people because I want you to learn, I want you to do it because you want to learn.”

“But I don’t know what’s going to help me!” Elena protested. “I need you to guide me, Damon!”

Damon sighed. “I know that, Lena, I do. And I will, I promise. But this is an incredibly personal journey, and it needs to be your journey. So let me do the right thing for once, alright?”

Elena rolled her eyes. “You need an ego boost.”

“Trust me, no I don’t.” Damon said, his eyes catching hers. “The thing that would make me happiest in the whole world, Elena, would be if you did not do _anything_ you don’t want to do while I’m helping you through this, alright? Do you understand me?”

“Yes.” Elena whispered.

“Good.” Damon said with a note of finality. He was tempted to tell her he wanted her to have perfect control, and never go too far when feeding from someone, and handle the bloodlust with all the grace and poise of someone who had been doing it for five hundred years rather than a few days.

But that would only end badly, he knew.

Sooner or later, they’d break the sire bond (if it did exist) and she’d be right back where she started.

“Am I going to have to become nocturnal?” Elena asked.

Damon smiled slightly. “No. You can’t go out in sunlight, but if there’s cloud cover we can go outside. It’s direct sunlight that affects you. And we don’t need to go out to work on your control issues; I’ll run to the nearest town and get some blood bags.”

Elena nodded. “How long before I need to feed again?”

“Generally, you only need to feed once a day.” Damon told her. “But it depends on the amount you drink. Other than that, your body will function normally.”

“Will I still get hungry? I mean, for real?”

Damon frowned. “Kind of. If someone puts your favourite meal in front of you, or you’re thinking about it, you’ll still want to eat it, and your stomach will still make those cute little gurgles it’s so fond of …”

Elena slapped his arm, rolling her eyes at his smirk.

“But you won’t get hungry if you go without food.” Damon finished, his smirk turning into a full-out grin. “You’ll still enjoy it though.”

“What about taste?” Elena asked now. “The blood in the hospital didn’t taste like it did before.”

“That’s because you’re a vampire now.” Damon answered. “Your taste buds have altered slightly.”

“So _that_ ’s why you like pickles so much.” Elena teased.

“No, I like pickles because they’re awesome.” Damon corrected. “I still can’t believe you don’t.”

Elena laughed, but broke off with a yawn. “How am I still tired?”

“I wasn’t lying about your energy spiking and falling.” Damon said, his grin softening. “Your emotions will be a bit of a rollercoaster as well. Let me know if you need a shoulder to cry on.”

He punctuated the offer with a wink, and Elena reacted with a cursory eye-roll and a giggle, but she knew he wasn’t joking around or being flippant.

She had a theory that this was what Damon had been like as a human, before he turned, and she was flattered (and a little overwhelmed) that he felt comfortable enough in her presence to show the humanity he hid so carefully from the rest of the world.

She had seen glimpses of it around other people – Jeremy, in the wake of Jenna’s death and Stefan’s disappearance; Stefan, when they weren’t at each other’s throats; Ric, in the strange friendship/brotherhood that shouldn’t have formed and yet was a stronger bond than anything she could have predicted – but she was the only person he let all of his walls down with, and she alone saw how vulnerable he truly was.

Not against stakes or werewolves or hybrids or Originals, but against his own heart, his own capacity to love so strongly that it consumed him, and she silently swore to keep that humanity alive, in the same way Lexi had sworn to draw out Stefan’s all those years ago.

“Come on.” Damon said, oblivious to her thoughts. “Let’s get you into bed.”

“In your dreams.” Elena shot back.

“Now when did I tell you about those dreams?” Damon asked, with a smirk. He led her up the stairs and along a corridor. “This is my room, in case you need me. As for you …” He frowned. “Let’s see if I can remember where the other rooms are. Haven’t needed them aside from mine.” He pushed open the next door along, and stopped. “Guess Father did bring Stefan here after all. It was a nursery last time I saw it.”

Elena peeked past him into a teenage boy’s room, frozen in time. It was similar to Stefan’s room now, but far less cluttered. “I don’t think so.”

“No?” Damon asked. “Heaven knows what my little brother left in there.”

“Exactly.” Elena agreed, backing out of the room. “I’d wind up snooping, and that’s not right, not without his permission.”

Damon shrugged. “Suit yourself. I think there’s a guest room somewhere, but if not …” He crossed the hall and pushed open another door. “Mother’s room.”

“Your parents didn’t share a room?” Elena asked curiously.

“My father was very old-fashioned in his habits.” Damon answered. “At the Manor, they shared a room, but because of the close proximity here, he felt it was ‘improper’ for them to share a room with us nearby.” He glanced back at Stefan’s room. “She had Stefan’s room prepared as soon as she found out he was on his way, apparently. Wanted us to spend our childhoods here, running around, fishing, etcetera, etcetera.”

“She wanted you to be children.” Elena concluded. “How old were you when she died?”

“I was six.” Damon answered bluntly. “She died a few weeks after Stefan was born … childbirth wasn’t exactly safe in those days.”

The room was beautiful and ornate, full of darkly stained wooden furniture, and looked as though it had been taken from the pages of a Jane Austen novel, which (Elena reminded herself) it had.

A huge bed took pride of place, neatly made, with a large, elaborately carved chest at the foot. The window was framed by thick, floor length curtains made of red velvet, and an armchair of the same colour sat beside it, turned to face the waning moon. There was a desk in one corner, littered with yellowing paper and writing implements, and above it, on the wall, was a framed portrait.

Elena took a step into the room to examine it. She had never seen a picture of Damon and Stefan’s mother before, and captured in paint it gave more detail than a black-and-white photograph could ever have given.

Her eyes travelled over Maria Salvatore’s laughing figure, seeing Damon’s eyes and Stefan’s smile, her black hair tumbling over one shoulder and mixing with the tousled curls of the child in her arms.

“A woman named Elsie painted that.” Damon told her, coming to stand beside her. “She was one of the maids.”

“A slave?” Elena asked curiously.

“Technically, yes, but Mother never liked the idea.” Damon said. “She said that people were people, that they bled and cried and laughed as we did. She couldn’t pay them, of course, she had no control over the family finances, but she treated them as equals. Elsie had a passion for art, which she confided in my mother. Mother always disliked the formal family portrait Father had commissioned -  said it was too stuffy – so she asked Elsie if she would paint a less rigid one in exchange for some proper art supplies for once.”

“Your father’s not in it.” Elena remarked, finally recognising the man standing next to her in the child in the portrait.

Damon snorted. “Father would never have agreed to it.”

“She was very talented.” Elena observed, sensing that Giuseppe Salvatore was a touchy subject. It wasn’t an empty statement though.  The painting was so vivid that she thought, if she just closed her eyes and concentrated, the laughter of mother and son would once again ring through the room.

“Yes.” Damon agreed. “And very kind. She practically raised me and Stefan after Mother passed.” He cleared his throat. “You’re welcome to stay in here.”

“Damon, I couldn’t …” Elena began, but he cut her off.

“Yes, you can.” Damon said firmly. “If there is a guest room, it won’t be made up and you need your rest.” His voice softened. “She would have loved you, Elena. She’d be the first to ask you to stay here if she could. Trust me.”

Slowly, Elena nodded. “Alright. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Damon said, leaving her side to rifle through the chest of drawers on the other side of the room. “Here. It’s a little old-fashioned, but it’ll do for tonight.” He handed her a white nightgown, and gestured towards another door she hadn’t noticed before. “There’s a bathroom through there, but this is the one room I didn’t change the fittings in. There’s electricity, but no modern shower or anything, so if you want, there’s another bathroom along the hall.”

Elena smiled. “Thanks. I’m sure I’ll be alright.”

“Okay, yell if you need anything.” Damon told her, dropping a kiss on her forehead. “We’ll start training tomorrow. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Damon.” Elena returned, hearing the door click behind him.

Peeling off her still slightly damp clothes, Elena slipped the nightdress on, surprised at how comfortable it was and how well it fit her.

Retrieving the cell phone Meredith had left from her jacket, Elena perched on the edge of her bed and stared at it for a few minutes.

She wanted to call Stefan and scream the truth at him until he believed it, but she didn’t have the energy.

She wanted to call Jeremy and beg him to tell her that Mom and Dad would still have loved her even as a vampire, and that he did too, but she couldn’t face it.

Instead, she began sending texts, to everyone and anyone that mattered, even if they wouldn’t get them.

_Bonnie – I know you know by now. Please don’t hate me. I’ll call when I’m ready. – Elena_

_Caroline – Thank you for trusting my judgement. Keep an eye on Stefan for me. I’ll call when I’m ready. – Elena_

_Jeremy – I’m a vampire. Stefan will explain. I’m safe, with Damon – yes, they’re the same thing. I love you. I’ll call when I’m ready. – Elena_

_Matt – Caroline will explain. Please don’t blame yourself. I’m glad you’re okay. I’ll call when I’m ready. – Elena_

_Tyler – I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. I miss you. – Elena_

Once the last text had been sent, Elena carefully pulled the curtains closed, making sure there were no gaps, and climbed into bed, burying her face in the soft pillows, before returning to the phone.

_Stefan –_

Elena stared at the screen for several minutes, waiting for inspiration to strike, but she couldn’t seem to find any way of putting her thoughts and feelings into words.

Her love for Stefan seemed to have magnified since she turned, and it didn’t seem right or even possible to spill it all out in a text message.

_Stefan – When you’re ready, we need to talk. In the meantime … please tell me that you don’t hate me. – Elena_

Sighing heavily, she leaned over to set the phone on the nightstand, but it vibrated in her hand, twice in quick succession, and she hastily checked the messages.

One from Jeremy and one … from Stefan.

She read Jeremy’s first, her heart thudding in a way it had no right to anymore.

_Lena – No matter what, you’re my sister. Don’t stay away too long. I love you – Jer_

A knot seemed to loosen in Elena’s stomach, and she opened Stefan’s message as well, needing and yet dreading to see what he had to say.

_I could never hate you, Elena, and I’m sorry if I gave that impression. This is difficult for all of us. I can’t do this anymore. – Stefan_

A sob bubbled up in her throat, and she tossed her phone onto the nightstand, closing her eyes against the onslaught of tears. She’d needed something, anything, to tell her that she hadn’t lost him, that she could still fix this, but all it had told her was …

_I can’t do this anymore._

The words were solid and final, but there was something about them that niggled at the back of Elena’s mind.

It wasn’t like Stefan to be so blunt by text. In person, maybe, but he wouldn’t have a conversation like that via text, not after kissing her so desperately before leaving to face Alaric.

Then a memory of a conversation returned to her, across the months of their separation, from a time when all they had to worry about was Katherine (not that she wasn’t a substantial worry).

_“Today, when we’re fighting, if I say “I can’t do this anymore, Elena”, what I’ll really mean is “I love you”.”_

If Stefan thought she was in love with Damon, especially after everything that had happened with Klaus, he would never rock the boat by telling her that outright.

But if she knew Stefan at all, he would find some way of telling her, even if it was in a way she might not recognise.

Grabbing the phone, she typed the words _Fine, Stefan, whatever_ , and sent the text, before settling down to sleep, a slight smile contradicting her tear-stained face.

_“And when I say, “Fine, Stefan, whatever”, that means “I love you too”.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and let me know what you think!


	4. Chapter 4

When Elena awoke the next morning, the first thing she noticed was the aching hunger inside her. With that in mind, it didn’t take her long to remember what had happened the day before, and she rolled over to hide her face in the pillow, groaning loudly.

The smell of breakfast wafted up the stairs and under the gap of the door, but it wasn’t what she wanted, what she craved – not by a long shot.

Still, it was something and it might just satisfy her long enough for Damon to procure some blood bags, so she reluctantly got up, running a hand through her hair.

There was a pile of neatly folded clothes on the top of the dresser, along with a silk robe, and Elena frowned, checking her phone.

_Odd … it’s not late. Damon must have gone out overnight._

Slipping the robe on, Elena tied it around her middle and stepped out of the room to find Damon doing the same thing down the corridor.

“You shouldn’t really leave breakfast on its own.” She cautioned. “Don’t want to burn the house down now, do we?”

Damon frowned. “I thought you were cooking. Where’d you get the robe?”

“It was on the dresser.” Elena answered slowly. “Didn’t you drop some clothes off?”

“Elena, I’ve been asleep.” Damon said, a little exasperatedly. “Where am I supposed to get clothes from? Thin air?”

“Damon …” Elena said slowly. “There is someone cooking breakfast. If we’re both up here, then who is it?” Her face brightened. “Do you think it’s Stefan?”

Damon grimaced. “Don’t get your hopes up. You know as well as I do that Stefan’s as stubborn as hell.”

“He told me that he loved me last night.” Elena said. “Well, sort of.”

“‘Sort of’?” Damon asked.

“Well, he kind of did it in code.” Elena explained. “I think.”

“Then it’s unlikely to be him.” Damon said bluntly, but not unkindly. “I suggest we find out who it is.”

Of all the people Elena expected to see in the kitchen, wearing an apron and serving up French toast and scrambled eggs, Katherine Pierce was not one of them.

But there she was all the same, humming to herself as she moved around the kitchen, looking uncharacteristically domestic.

“What the hell are you doing?” Damon asked, too shocked to sound angry.

“Making breakfast.” Katherine answered, not looking up. “Hope you both like French toast. I made a lot.”

“Don’t be cute, Katherine.” Damon said rolling his eyes. “What are you doing in my kitchen?!”

“Well, I’d look a bit of an idiot making breakfast in the living room, now, wouldn’t I, Damon?” Katherine retorted.

Sensing that Damon was on the urge of blowing up, Elena stepped forward, placing a calming hand on his arm. “I think what Damon means, Katherine, is what are you doing here, in this house, rather than in Cyprus hiding from Klaus?”

“Wasn’t in Cyprus. Wasn’t far from Mystic Falls.” Katherine answered. “Heard Klaus was dead. Heard what happened to you. Thought I’d come and help.”

Damon let out a bark of humourless laughter. “Katherine, the word ‘help’ isn’t in your vocabulary.”

Katherine gave him a dirty look. “Sometimes it is.”

Elena looked down at the robe she was wearing. “You left me this? And the other clothes?”

“I did.” Katherine confirmed. “All the curtains are closed down here, although you’ll be pleased to note that it is very cloudy today, so you can probably go outside …”

“I’ll be the judge of that.” Damon said darkly.

“And I got blood-bags.” Katherine continued, as though he hadn’t spoken. “I know you won’t trust me, but you can get Damon to check the seals; I promise they haven’t been opened …”

“Katherine, why are you doing this?” Elena asked softly.

Katherine paused in her movement, and fixed Elena with a contemplative gaze. “Maybe I feel like being nice.” She said after a few minutes. “Maybe for the first time in my life, I can actually live my life rather than looking over my shoulder, and I want to celebrate by helping you.” She smirked. “Or maybe I have an ulterior motive.”

“What ulterior motive?” Elena asked. “What do you get out of helping me?”

“Well, I won’t get the blame if you snap and kill people.” Katherine said with a shrug.

“She’s not going to kill people.” Damon said.

“All newbies kill people, Damon.” Katherine said breezily. “It’s pretty much a given.”

“Damon …”

“You won’t, Elena.” Damon told her, not taking his eyes off Katherine.

Katherine glanced at her again, and her smirk softened. “He’s right, Elena. We won’t let you.”

“We?” Damon repeated. “Did you just join my side?”

Katherine rounded the island in the middle of the kitchen, brushing against his chest as she met his eyes. “Damon, I’ve always been on your side.”

Damon snorted and left the room. “Yeah right!” He called back.

“Your call, Elena.” Katherine prompted. “If you want me to go, then I’ll go.”

Elena lowered her voice. “Why _are_ you helping? You hate me.”

“I wouldn’t go _that_ far.” Katherine disagreed. “We’re family, after all. Do you want my help or not?”

Elena’s immediate instinct was to say no, but Damon’s warning the night before came back to her. “Excuse me a second.” She said, following Damon into the living area. “Can you tell me it’s okay?”

“What’s okay?” Damon asked, peering through the gap in the curtains. “She’s right about the cloud cover – you should be alright. Do you want to try it?”

Elena hesitated, then shook her head. “Not today.”

“Alright.” Damon replied easily, turning to her. “What’s okay?”

“My instinct is to ask her to leave.” Elena said softly. “But I need to know it’s my instinct and not yours. I know you don’t particularly want her around.”

“No.” Damon said with a grimace. “But then she’s a doppelganger as well. There may be something she knows that I don’t. It would make me happy if you decided this for yourself. And I mean that.”

Elena nodded, returning to the kitchen. “What’s the catch?”

“No catch.” Katherine told her. “I swear to you, Elena.”

“Then what do you get out of it?” Elena asked. “Seriously, not that ‘not getting the blame’ thing – we both know you’d wriggle out of it; you always do.”

Katherine smiled slightly. “Thank you.”

Elena couldn’t help remembering Damon’s words of warning after Katherine had first returned to Mystic Falls: _“She’s Katherine. She loves to play games, and you’re fooling yourself if you think you can figure out what she’s up to before she wants you to know.”_

His words, although bitter, had held a certain amount of admiration, and Elena wondered how much of his ‘I hate Katherine’ facade had been false before she had rejected him once and for all.

She wondered how much of it still was.

“I still want an answer.” Elena said firmly.

Katherine shrugged, hopping up on to the counter. “We’ve talked before, Elena. In the tomb. You asked me a question that I laughed off, and you told me that my humanity really was lost, remember?”

“Did you ever think about your daughter?” Elena remembered.

Katherine gestured her over to the blender, switching it on. “I’d rather Damon didn’t eavesdrop.” She said softly, causing Elena to move a little closer to hear her properly. “Truth is, Elena, I lied. I do think about her. I think about her more than I like to admit. Because they tell you that if you never saw your child that you’re not really a mother, but I didn’t need to see her. I loved her, whatever you may think of me, Elena. I loved my daughter.”

“I believe you.” Elena said softly. “But what does that …?”

“You are the last piece of my daughter that remains on this earth.” Katherine said bluntly. “And that means something to me. For my daughter’s sake, I want to help you.”

Elena stared into eyes identical to her own, trying to gauge whether Katherine was telling the truth. Her eyes seemed to be clear of the usual mixture of deceit and seduction, and it didn’t seem like Katherine to use something so intensely personal to manipulate her.

Then again, it didn’t seem like Katherine to admit something so intensely personal in the first place.

“Is there a difference?” Elena asked. “Being a doppelganger? Does it make a difference?”

“No.” Katherine answered. “At least, I don’t think so.”

_If she had an angle, she’d have said yes._

“Alright.” Elena said slowly. “I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but … I think I need all the help I can get.”

“Good.” Katherine said with a smirk, releasing the button on the blender and hopping down from the counter. “Because I wasn’t planning on leaving.”

“Didn’t think you were.” Elena muttered, playing with a strand of hair restlessly.

Katherine must have noticed, because she retrieved a mug from the microwave. “Here. You need blood. And it’s nicer warm.” She held up a hand as Elena moved forwards. “Wait. Get that under control first.”

Elena stopped, feeling her teeth lengthening and her face changing. “I don’t think I can.”

“Nonsense.” Katherine said bluntly, setting the mug down. “You have the Petrova fire, Elena. With that fire comes stubbornness. Close your eyes, take a deep breath. Breathe through it.”

“Katherine, she needs blood.” Damon said, reappearing from the living room. “Now.”

“Wait.” Katherine said softly. “Just wait.”

Elena closed her eyes, breathing through her mouth. The smell of blood was overwhelming, and her hands clenched into fists, her nails cutting into her palms and drawing blood themselves.

She wasn’t sure why she was taking Katherine’s advice over Damon’s; she just knew that she was not going to let the blood control her, and she might as well start now.

Slowly, painfully slowly, she felt her face relax and her teeth return to normal, and opened her eyes to see Katherine smiling at her.

“Better.” Katherine said, handing her the mug. “Don’t stand on ceremony.”

Elena didn’t, gulping the blood down hungrily, only for the shame to hit her almost immediately afterwards.

“Elena, it’s okay.” Damon said in a low voice, seeing the expression in her eyes. “After a couple of days, the initial rush wears off. Form comes in time.”

“You’ll be fine.” Katherine told her, almost dismissively.

“How do you know?” Elena asked.

“You didn’t fight it.” Katherine answered simply. “Most vampires would have ignored me and fought to get to the blood. You didn’t. You got the bloodlust under control first.”

“But I didn’t, did I?” Elena muttered.

Katherine snorted. “That wasn’t bloodlust, Elena. That was desperation. The first couple of days are like being stuck in a dessert, and every drop of blood is the first drop of water you’ve seen in days. Your body needed it. We’ll try it again in an hour.”

“She doesn’t need to feed again for four, at least.” Damon pointed out.

Katherine rolled her eyes. “The more often she feeds for the first few days, the faster the initial rush wears off, Damon. You know that.”

“No, I didn’t.” Damon disagreed. “I’ve never heard that before.”

“No one told you when you turned?” Katherine asked, sounding surprised.

Damon gave her a dirty look. “Who exactly was supposed to tell me, Katherine? You’d fucked off, and left me with a witch who barely tolerated me, who was killed not even a year later. Stefan and I figured it out on our own, in case you’d forgotten.”

Katherine had the decency to look a little guilty. “Damon …”

“Hearing.” Damon interrupted, turning to Elena. “We’ll start with your hearing. You might have noticed that everything sounds louder …”

Elena nodded. “Understatement.”

“You just need to readjust.” Damon told her.

“Can we eat first?” Elena asked. “I know you said I don’t need food, but it’s still making me hungry.”

“Best way to hang on to your humanity.” Katherine said, handing Elena a plate. “Help yourself.”

Elena helped herself to some French toast and eggs. “You know, I always wondered what Caroline was talking about when she complained about warring parents. Now I know.”

“Except we’re not your parents.” Damon pointed out, still glaring at Katherine. “And we’re not together.”

“No, but you both think you know best how to help me.” Elena pointed out. “And you’re disagreeing over it in a slightly frosty, slightly uncomfortable way. It’s kinda like Bill and Liz used to act after they were divorced.”

Damon rolled his eyes. “Just eat your breakfast.”

“Or what?” Elena asked, grinning. “You’ll ground me?”

Damon pretended not to hear her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously wondering whether anyone's actually reading this.
> 
> Yes, I am aware Katherine is a little OOC, but then the whole fic is basically AU, so ...


	5. Chapter 5

For the rest of the day, Damon and Katherine coached Elena in handling her new lifestyle. Damon had her focus on several different sounds to train her hearing, and slowly but surely, she felt her surroundings mute slightly, back to the way they used to be.

Every hour, Katherine would interrupt with a blood-bag, withholding it until Elena had gained some semblance of control.

By eight o’clock that evening, Damon had changed tactics, and was now challenging Elena to switch her enhanced hearing on and off again on demand.

She had just finished guessing the number of birds sitting on the roof of the house, when Damon said, “New plan. Kitchen. Katherine’s talking.”

Elena focused on that direction, and Katherine’s voice suddenly got louder, as though she tuned in to the right radio station. “… something new. Let me know when you can hear me, Elena.”

“I can.” Elena said, not bothering to raise her voice. “What are we doing?”

“This time I want you to try to stop your face changing in the first place.” Katherine told her. “Ready?”

“How do I do that?” Elena asked.

“Deep breaths.” Damon answered. “Look at me, not at the blood.”

Elena nodded slowly. “Okay. I’m ready.”

It wasn’t easy.

As soon as the smell of blood hit her, Elena felt the hunger begin to stir within her. Her eyes locked with Damon’s, silently pleading for help, and he took her hands. “Do you remember the time Caroline decided to sing at the Grill to get Matt to get back together with her?”

Elena laughed weakly. “You’re not going to sing to get my mind off it, are you?”

“You’d better hope he doesn’t.” Katherine told her, as she approached. “He can’t carry a tune in a bucket.”

“You’re one to talk, Miss Tone-Daf.” Damon retorted.

“I am not tone-deaf.” Katherine said, without heat. “I just prefer the piano to singing.”

“You play piano?” Elena asked, refusing to look at Katherine, or the blood she was carrying.

“When you have eternity, you find yourself trying a lot of things.” Katherine said. “Piano was one of the few things I enjoyed. Damon … yours was painting, wasn’t it?”

“I’m not very good at it.” Damon said bluntly.

“Liar.” Katherine smirked. “I saw your work in Venice.”

“What was Venice like?” Elena asked, almost desperately. The discussion was almost a distraction, but the smell was just too intoxicating.

“Beautiful.” Damon answered, releasing her hands as she lost the battle. “Alright, Katherine, hand it over.”

Elena sighed, taking the mug and drinking deeply. “Sorry.”

“Don’t apologise.” Katherine told her. “That was good for a first try.”

“She’s right.” Damon agreed. “Though it pains me to admit it. You’re doing really well, Elena.”

“It doesn’t feel like it.” Elena said heavily, placing the mug on the coffee table.

“You’re drinking with more dignity now.” Katherine pointed out. “You don’t act like you’re starving anymore.”

“That took me a week.” Damon added. “Although, apparently, I wasn’t feeding properly.”

Katherine sighed. “Damon …”

“What were you doing in Venice?” Damon asked. “Running from Klaus, obviously, but why not run as soon as you saw me?”

“Maybe you were part of the reason I was there in the first place.” Katherine said. “It wasn’t just Stefan I kept an eye on, you know.”

“So you stalked me.” Damon said flatly. “Good to know.” He straightened up, rounded the couch, and disappeared into the kitchen.

Elena watched him go, frowning slightly. He had just intentionally walked almost all the way around the room to get to the kitchen, rather than walk a straight line to the door.

In fact, he had been avoiding that part of the room all day – the part that held the old armchair he’d stared at the night before.

“I can’t win.” Katherine remarked. “He was upset when he thought I didn’t keep an eye on him, and now he’s pissed off because I did.”

“That’s not why he’s pissed off.” Elena disagreed, still frowning. “He was madly in love with you, to the point that he spent 145 years desperately trying to get you back, and you must have seen that struggle, but you still did nothing.”

“Sometimes, Elena, the end justifies the means.” Katherine said flatly.

Elena didn’t bother asking for an explanation. Katherine often spoke cryptically, and it was normally an attempt to get a rise out of the person she was talking to, either out of irritation or because of a veiled insult.

Elena had reached this realisation while Katherine was trapped in the tomb, and she had gone down to talk to her about Klaus and the threat he posed to her loved ones.

Katherine had been almost catatonic from the lack of blood, despite Elena’s small donations every so often, and partway through the discussion, Elena had taken the opportunity to ask something that had been bothering her for a while.

_“Why both of them? Why turn both of them?”_

Katherine’s response, listless and slurred, had been uncharacteristically sentimental.  _“I fell in love. As corny as it sounds, I wanted to be his angel for eternity. And I could never condemn him to eternity without his brother, so I had to take desperate measures."_

Her use of the word ‘angel’ had thrown Elena at first. After all, Katherine was far from an angel, and, for all her faults, would never consider herself one.

It only took her a few minutes to figure out that ‘angel’ had been a pet-name, and she had changed the subject back to Klaus, and Katherine’s past.

She didn’t know if Katherine had been expecting her to throw a fit of jealousy, but the older woman had looked slightly disappointed when Elena didn’t react.

_Katherine’s compulsion must really have worked, if Stefan used to call her ‘angel’._

Stefan wasn’t one for pet-names. He called Elena ‘sweetheart’, and occasionally ‘baby’, but they were fairly generic.

‘Angel’ felt … different.

“Katherine,” Elena said, trying to take her mind off of Stefan and Katherine. It didn’t normally bother her that they used to date – it was 146 years ago, after all – but given the current state of her relationship, it didn’t make her feel any better. “You’ve been here before. What’s the deal with that chair?”

Katherine turned to survey it. “It’s old.”

Elena rolled her eyes. “I can see that. It’s the only thing in this room that I’d say was here in 1864. Why? What’s so special about it?”

“How should I know?” Katherine asked.

“Well, you were here in 1864.” Elena pointed out. “Something tells me Damon won’t tell me.”

Katherine looked at the chair for a few seconds, then moved across the room to sit in it, looking around the room as though to gauge the view. Something crossed her face, but it was gone in the next second. “I don’t know. Something sentimental, I should think.”

For once, Elena could tell that Katherine was lying through her teeth, but didn’t press for the truth. “Okay. I was just wondering why Damon was avoiding it.”

“Something sentimental I should think.” Katherine repeated quietly, her eyes fixed on a spot opposite her, on the other side of the fireplace. There used to be another chair there, once upon a time ...

_“Fire’s dying.” Damon said, cutting through Katherine’s thoughts. “I’ll go and get some more firewood.”_

_Katherine looked up from her book, glancing through the window at the full moon. “I’m sure we’ll be alright. It’s late.” She wasn’t even sure if there were any werewolves left, but she didn’t want Damon to take any chances._

_“Are you sure?” Damon asked. “If you’re cold …”_

_Katherine set her book to one side, smiling at him. “I’m sure you can think of another way to keep me warm.” She watched almost lazily, as he got to his feet and crossed the floor. She was expecting him to help her to her feet and embrace her, but, as always, he surprised her, scooping her out of the chair and sitting in it himself, with her on his lap._

_“Is that better?”_

_Katherine’s arms locked around his neck, as he surprised a laugh out of her. “Mm, much better.” She purred, her lips meeting his._

_It wasn’t the first time they had curled up in that chair, but it was the first time Damon had instigated it. She was glad he was starting to loosen up with her – he was definitely less proper with her than his brother, but he was still the Southern gentleman his mother raised._

_“Did you mean it?” Damon asked, when they parted._

_Katherine toyed with the collar of his shirt. “About warming me up?”_

_“About turning me.” Damon corrected._

_Katherine’s hands stilled, her eyes lifting to meet his. “Is that what you want?”  
_

_“I want you.” Damon said in a low voice. “Forever.”_

_Katherine smiled softly. “Then I meant it.” Her hand left his collar to touch his face. “But not yet. It is not a decision to be taken lightly, my love.”_

_Damon nodded, his hand covering hers. “How did you turn? You’ve never told me.”_

_Katherine froze for a moment. “That is because it is hardly a conversation suitable for polite conversation.”_

_“When have we ever been polite?” Damon asked sardonically._

_A smile touched Katherine’s lips. “I will tell you, Damon, one day. But it is not a time I remember fondly, and it is not a story I enjoy telling.”_

_“Very well.” Damon’s hand left hers to run through her hair. “Then I will not ask.”_

_Katherine’s smile widened of its own accord, and she found herself spontaneously rewarding him for his patience. “It was in England. A vampire named Rose turned me.”_

_“That’s where you were born, correct?” Damon asked, clearly intrigued, yet trying to abide by her wishes._

_“No.” Katherine admitted slowly. “I was born in Bulgaria. Katerina Petrova.”_

_“Katerina …” Damon repeated. “It suits you. But Katherine suits you better.” He added, apparently noticing the way her nose wrinkled._

_People calling her Katerina, especially in the soft, affectionate tone Damon often used with her, brought back memories she’d far sooner forget._

_“I thought so.” Katherine agreed, pressing her lips to his jaw and trailing kisses down his neck, shifting to straddle him as she bit softly at his collarbone, keeping her fangs hidden._

_“Why do you never feed from me?” Damon murmured, lacing his fingers with hers._

_Katherine hesitated, lifting her head. “I don’t know.” She admitted, honestly. “Would you like me to?”_

_“I’m yours, Katherine.” Damon said. “And I know you are not entirely mine; St …”_

_“Ssh.” Katherine whispered, placing a finger on his lips. “No ‘S’ word while we’re here, remember? Your rules.”  
_

_“I thought you didn’t believe in rules.” Damon said lightly._

_Katherine laughed. “They have their uses.” Her laughter died a little, and she looked at him seriously, her teeth lengthening. “But, since you mention it, I am getting hungry.”_

_Even after everything Katherine had gone through, she found it a little overwhelming the way Damon continued to look at her with nothing less than pure love in his eyes, even when faced with her vampire visage, which would send most people running for the hills._

_Damon tilted his head, baring his neck to her. “Then feed, my love.”_

_Slowly, Katherine lowered her head, keeping her gaze locked with his for as long as she could. She wasn’t sure why she was being so tentative with Damon. If he changed his mind, she could just compel him, as she had with Stefan._

_But Damon wasn’t Stefan, and Stefan wasn’t Damon, and although that had once been a small fact, it was now more obvious than ever._

_Her lips brushed his neck, darting over the vein, feeling the blood pulse beneath his skin. She focused her hearing, locking on to the steady beat of his heart, which was faster than it should have been, but still rhythmic. Closing her eyes, she sank her fangs into his skin, feeling his sharp intake of breath, but focusing mostly on the sweet blood that flooded her mouth._

_Katherine hadn’t been lying when she said she was getting hungry, but she had fed that day, several times, on some unsuspecting travellers._

_Despite this, she drank hungrily, a low moan of pleasure escaping her. Generally, all blood tasted the same, with a slight variance every now and then, but Damon’s was intoxicating, and she had to force herself to pull away when she heard his heart beginning to slow._

_Throwing her head back, she took a deep breath, licking the last remnants of blood from her lips. His hand touched her face, and she leaned into it, feeling her face settle. “You taste incredible.” She murmured._

_“Doesn’t everyone?” Damon asked, his face tinged ever-so-slightly pink._

_“Well, yes.” Katherine conceded. “But that was different.” She trailed a finger down the side of his face. “I may need to do that again.”_

_“Take what you want.” Damon said huskily. “Anything. Everything.”_

_Katherine shifted again on his lap, so she was curled up with him, rather than straddling him. “Later. I doubt you’re not nearly as interesting when you’re unconscious.” She bit her thumb lightly, drawing blood, and let a few drops fall on the wound on his neck._

_It wasn’t as effective as it would be had he drunk her blood, but it closed the wound and got rid of the aroma._

_Damon kissed her hair, his fingers playing with a few strands. “Are you sure we can’t stay here forever?”_

_“You know we can’t.” Katherine said softly. “You know what society feels about the rules of courting. And your father and brother would notice if we stayed away for too long.”_

_At the mention of Stefan, Damon stiffened against her. “Yes, I’m sure they would be quite upset if they realised where we are. Especially my brother.”_

_Katherine smiled a little at the thinly-veiled jealously in Damon’s voice, and cupped his face, gently coaxing his gaze towards her. “I love you, Damon.”_

_Damon’s face softened into a smile. “I love you too, my angel.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Damon told Elena he knew Katherine's real name because he saw an heirloom, but I like this way :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who's commented so far - please let me know what you think!

_The house was quiet, almost silent. Her footsteps seemed to echo across the entrance hall, yet no one emerged to greet her._

_Possibly they were all outside._

_She ascended the stairs gracefully, with no sign to suggest she was not the respectable lady of society she appeared to be, just one small drop of blood glistening in the corner of her mouth._

_As she entered her quarters, she called out to her handmaiden. “Emily, Miss Pearl will be visiting in an hour. I shall need to …”  
_

_A clatter and a thump coming from her bedchamber stopped her._

_“Emily?”_

_She stepped towards the door, pushing it open, and froze in place, her mouth opening in a silent scream._

_Damon was lying in the ground, his blue eyes wide with shock and fear, a gaping hole in his chest marking where his heart had once resided._

_She backed up hastily, colliding with a solid body, and spun around to meet another set of blue eyes, cold and calculating._

_One hand held Damon’s heart, dripping blood to the ground, and his lips curved into a cruel smile. “Hello, Katarina. I warned you could not run from me.”  
_

With a sharp gasp, Elena bolted upright in bed, her heart racing. _It was a dream._ She told herself firmly. _Just a dream. Although … why’d I dreamed I was Katherine, I don’t know …_

A scream elsewhere in the house made her jump again and answered her question all at the same time.

Jumping out of bed, Elena pulled a robe on and darted out into the corridor, almost colliding with Damon as she did.

“Do you think she’s being attacked?” Damon asked, trying to usher Elena back into her room.

Elena rolled her eyes. “Even if she was, I’d be able to help, so cut it out! But she’s not. It’s a nightmare, I just saw it as well. It was 1864 and she got home to find that Klaus had killed you and was waiting for her. Scared the hell out of me.” She added quietly.

Damon frowned slightly, squeezing her shoulder absently. “Okay then … Go back to bed, Elena. I’ll talk to her.”

“Are you sure?” Elena asked dubiously.

Damon gave her a smile. “Yeah, it’ll be fine. Go back to bed.”

Almost reluctantly, Elena did so, the door shutting behind her. Damon’s smile faded almost instantly. What was going on with Katherine at the moment?

He had overheard her conversation with Elena about the chair, and he knew that she knew why it was important to him.

Hanging on to the chair where Katherine had first fed from him seemed stupid, even to him, but he couldn’t get rid of it.

He just wasn’t expecting Katherine to remember.

She had made it very clear that it was Stefan she was in love with … and yet she was having nightmares about _him_ dying?

When he reached the spare room, which Katherine had claimed for the week, he knocked lightly out of habit, and let himself in.

Katherine was still asleep, her body almost rigid as she screamed.

Damon approached her warily, reaching out to touch her shoulder. “Katherine?”

Her eyes shot open and her screaming broke off into a gasp as she bolted upright.

Damon waited a few seconds for her to regain her composure. “Katherine?”

Still breathing deeply, though she didn’t need to, Katherine faked a smile and patted his arm. “I’m fine.”

Her hand didn’t leave him, gripping his bare forearm like a lifeline, as though reassuring herself he was still there.

Damon raised an eyebrow. “You don’t seem fine.”

“It was a nightmare, Damon.” Katherine said, with an airy laugh. “Shame no one told my head that.”

“You were screaming.” Damon said flatly. “Elena saw your nightmare – God knows how …”

“We’re doppelgangers.” Katherine pointed out, running her free hand through her hair. “We have a connection. I’ll apologise tomorrow.”

“Strange nightmare to have.” Damon remarked. “1864. What brought that on?”

“Memories, I suppose.” Katherine said, releasing his arm hastily. “Goodnight, Damon.”

Damon stood up, recognising the dismissal. “Why me? You never loved me – why me?”

“Goodnight, Damon.” Katherine repeated, not looking at him.

Damon sighed, and made for the door. “Goodnight, Katherine.”

***

Nothing was said about Katherine’s nightmare. Katherine apologised to Elena for projecting it, Elena apologised to Katherine for giving Damon any details whatsoever, and the matter was dropped.

The next few days passed in much the same way as the first. Slowly, but surely, Elena’s lust for blood grew more manageable, and the number of times she fed began to diminish.

By the end of the fourth day, Katherine had disappeared again, and Elena could hold a cup of blood without feeling the urge to drink from it for over an hour.

“It’ll never disappear completely.” Damon told her, as she took small sips. “But that’ll be enough to get you out of a situation and away from people you could hurt.”

“I know.” Elena said gratefully. “Believe me, I know. That the end of Katherine’s stay?” She was surprised to find that she was almost disappointed.

Elena still wasn’t entirely sure she could trust Katherine, but the Katherine she had seen recently, without the lies and the manipulations, was someone Elena could get along with.

They may have had many differences between them – in fact, they were almost total opposites – but that didn’t stop Elena from actually enjoying Katherine’s company.

“No, she’ll be back.” Damon said. “We thought we’d try something different.”

“What?” Elena asked slowly. He was fidgeting slightly, a kind of nervousness she’d never seen before in Damon.

Damon folded his arms. “Remember what I said the first night we got here? About the sire bond?”

“The thing that will make you happiest is if I don’t do anything I don’t want to do.” Elena recited.

“Exactly.” Damon said. “Remember that, okay? Keep that in mind at all times. Katherine’s back.”

As he said it, the front door opened and Katherine walked in, followed by a man in his early twenties, who gazed at his surroundings in a slight daze.

“Damon, Elena, this is Derek.” Katherine said, waving an airy hand in his direction.

“And why is Derek here?” Elena asked, although she had a feeling she knew the answer.

“Because we’re going to teach you to feed from the vein.” Katherine answered.

Elena swallowed hard and took a shaky breath. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt someone, but she also wanted to learn how to feed safely. “Does Derek know that’s why he’s here?”

Katherine smirked. “Oh, he knows. We had a little chat at the bar, didn’t we? Something about why it’s a bad idea to slip roofies into girls’ drinks.”

That made Elena feel a little better about what was about to happen. “Okay, so what do I do?”

“We’ll just work on feeding tonight.” Damon explained. “If it goes well, we’ll teach you how to hunt.”

Elena nodded jerkily. “What if …?”

“We won’t let you take too much.” Damon told her.

“But you won’t always be there.” Elena pointed out. “How do I …?”

Damon grimaced. “Well, that’s the difficult part. It’s a trial and error thing.”

“No, it’s not.” Katherine disagreed. “It’s all in the heartbeat, Elena. You can do it by touch or sound, but as soon as it starts slowing, that’s when you stop. Anymore, and they’ll be unconscious at best.”

Elena glanced at Damon, whose expression was completely unreadable. “You didn’t know that, did you?”

“No, I worked with trial and error.” Damon answered stiffly. “So did Stefan.”

“I really screwed up with you two, didn’t I?” Katherine remarked.

“You’re only just realising that?” Damon asked bitingly.

“So what do I do?” Elena asked hastily, breaking into the argument.

“Alright, I’ve only compelled him to go along with it.” Katherine said. “So you’re going to need to compel the rest.”

“Compel what?” Elena questioned.

Katherine shrugged. “Whatever you want. Thoughts, actions, feelings …”

“Or lack thereof.” Damon added.

Elena eyed Derek contemplatively. “So … I could compel him not to feel fear? Or pain?”

“You heard what I said about the roofies, right?” Katherine asked.

“You don’t get to take the high road on that line, Katherine.” Damon said harshly. “Not after 1864.”

Elena sighed. “Take a seat, Derek.” She said. “This could take a while.”

“Damon, I admit I screwed you over,” Katherine said, frowning, “but I didn’t …”

“Not me!” Damon snapped. “Stefan. Were you ever going to tell me you were _compelling_ my brother?”

“They’ve been positively civil for the last four days.” Elena explained to Derek. “It had to bubble over eventually.”

Katherine’s compulsion had left Derek unresponsive, so talking to him was pointless, but she was half-hoping that her companions would remember that she was there.

Damon’s question caused Katherine to falter for a second. “I wasn’t … Damon, you’re hardly innocent on the compulsion front!”

“I have my limits!” Damon argued. “I’ve never compelled a woman into …”

“Caroline.” Elena interrupted, without thinking. “Andie.”

“I didn’t compel them into sleeping with me.” Damon told her firmly. “I compelled them into letting me feed from them. Not being afraid of me. Not telling anyone what I was.”

“Which is exactly what I did.” Katherine said icily. “I know Stefan thinks I compelled him to love me, but he did that by himself. I compelled him not to be afraid of me, yes, and perhaps you could argue that if I hadn’t, he would have felt differently. If he had ended things and walked away, I would have let him.”

“Bullshit.” Damon said bluntly. “First thing you did when you came back to town was try to get Stefan back.”

“That wasn’t …” Katherine cut herself off abruptly. “I’m not having this discussion.”

“Now why doesn’t that surprise me?” Damon muttered. “So why did you never compel me? You compelled Stefan into letting you feed from him, but you waited until I brought it up. Why?”

But Katherine seemed to have regained her control, and she ignored the question, turning back to Elena. “Yes, Elena, you can compel him not to feel fear or pain. But you shouldn’t need to do the first, because my compulsion covered that.”

Elena glanced at Damon, who smiled weakly at her and nodded reassuringly.

“Remember,” he said, “you can walk away if that’s what you want.”

Elena took a deep breath. “No. No, I want to do this. Any tips?”

“Believe what you’re telling him.” Damon advised.

“Be firm.” Katherine added. “Don’t leave anything ambiguous. This guy’s wasted and he’s not the brightest spark to begin with; he’ll be fine. But if you’re dealing with people who have a brain, they can realise there’s something wrong.”

“Like Jeremy?” Elena asked. “Damon compelled him to forget Vicki was dead and that he never found out about vampires, but he broke the compulsion after he met Anna and Vicki’s body turned up.”

“Precisely.” Damon agreed. “It took me a couple of years to get that down.”

“Couple of decades.” Katherine corrected softly. “I had to re-compel several of your dining partners.”

“Anything else?” Elena questioned, before another argument could erupt.

“Not with compulsion.” Katherine answered. “Go for it. You’ll feel silly to start with, with an audience – try to ignore it.”

Elena moved in front of Derek and looked him in the eye. “This isn’t going to hurt. You’re not going to feel any pain.”

“I’m not going to feel any pain.” Derek repeated monotonously.

“Now I find it easier to stand behind them,” Katherine said, “and then you can use your right hand to find his pulse.”

Elena moved to stand behind the couch, placing two fingers on Derek’s pulse point. The steady beat of life beneath her fingertips sent a shiver of hunger racing through her, and she took a deep breath, forcing it down.

“Good girl.” Damon said softly. “But you can let it go now, Elena. You’re going to need those fangs. Now you want to aim for the neck, _not_ the shoulder. You can break through bone, but the mark is way too obvious and you don’t really want to get into the habit of giving blood to heal them.”

“And the neck doesn’t need healing?” Elena asked.

“Well, it leaves a wound.” Damon conceded. “But you only need to use your fangs. Try to bite with your top jaw, not the bottom. Pierce, don’t bite.”

“We’ll keep track of his heart rate as well.” Katherine added. “We’ll stop you if you lose control. Remember, as soon as it begins to slow – make sure you focus on the pulse, not the taste, however intoxicating it may be.”

“And it’s always more intoxicating drinking from the vein.” Damon warned. “However good your control is. It’s in your nature to hunt – your instinct will be to drain him.”

“But your compassion will save you.” Katherine said, seeing Elena pale. “And him.”

“Stefan’s didn’t.” Elena said shakily.

“Stefan didn’t have anyone teaching him to feed properly.” Damon said, giving Katherine another dirty look. “We’re here, Lena. We won’t let it happen.”

Elena nodded, feeling her teeth lengthen. She adjusted her grip on the man’s pulse point, and sunk her fangs into his skin.

Blood flooded her mouth, and she closed her eyes, swallowing fervently. Damon was right – it did taste different, almost like the difference between drinking orange juice from a carton and freshly squeezed.

But his pulse beat rhythmically beneath her fingers, reminding her that this was not a blood bag, but a living, breathing human being.

She remembered what Stefan had said, after Klaus had compelled him to drink from her. _“All I hear is the sound of your heart pumping blood through your body.”_

Elena couldn’t help feeling a surge of sympathy for Stefan. She knew how strong his compassion was, and only now did she truly appreciate how difficult his struggle was for him.

The beat beneath her fingers began to slow, and she pulled away, licking the last of the blood from her lips.

The wound was better than she expected – two marks where her fangs had been, and a very slight indent from the rest of her teeth.

“That’ll fade.” Katherine said softly. “Next step, compel him to forget and send him home.”

Pulling Derek to his feet, Elena led him to the door, catching his eye. “You got drunk and wandered off into the woods and got lost. You’re not going to remember any of this. You’re going to find your way back to the town you came from. And the next time you think about drugging some girl for a good time, you’re going to feel like throwing up.”

“Nicely done.” Katherine remarked, once the front door had closed. “How do you feel?”

Elena considered it for a few minutes. “I feel amazing.” She said finally. “Really incredible. I was so worried about the bloodlust controlling me, and that I’d end up hurting or killing someone, but … Now I actually feel like I might be able to control _it_.”

“Well, I never doubted you.” Damon said smugly.

“You’ve got too much faith in me sometimes.” Elena shot back.

Damon smirked. “Of course I do. I’m your best friend – one of us has to.”

Elena laughed. She didn’t know whether it was the fresh blood or the fact that Derek had walked out of the house without a problem, but she felt better than she had in days. “I need to make a phone call.” She said. “Think you two can avoid killing each other in the meantime?”

“No promises.” Damon said darkly.

Elena rolled her eyes, and walked through the kitchen and out of the back door. She was just grateful she had turned during the winter, when the days were longer and the nights were shorter, giving her more time to spend outside, even without a daylight ring. _Need to talk to Bonnie about that._

Pulling her new cell phone from her pocket, she leaned against a tree and dialled Jeremy’s number. She had never been so grateful that she had a good memory for numbers, much like Stefan’s for dates.

It seemed to ring forever, but finally, she got an answer.

_“Hello?”_

Elena froze, the words dying in her mouth. She hadn’t realised how much hearing her brother’s voice would affect her.

_“Hello?”_

“Jeremy …” Elena whispered.

_“Elena? Oh God … Elena, are you okay?”_

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.” Elena said, as a half-laugh, half-sob bubbled up in her mouth. “I’m fine. Are you?”

_“Yeah. Yeah, I’m good. Listen, I know that you’re worried about Mom and Dad, and me, and our family, and God knows what else, but … I just want you to know that no matter what, you’re my sister. That didn’t change when I found out you got Damon to compel me – twice. It didn’t change when I found out you’re adopted. And it’s not gonna change now. I love you, Lena.”_

Elena sniffed. “I love you too, Jer.”

_“Any idea when you’re coming home?”_

Elena glanced back at the house. “Not yet. There are a few more tests I need to pass before I feel comfortable around people. What are you up to?” She asked, just catching the beat of a bass line in the background.

_“I’m at the Grill. We don’t want to break the news to Mayor Lockwood until you’re back for the funeral, so we’re kinda saying goodbye to Tyler tonight.”  
_

Elena nodded, her lump forming in her throat. “Thanks. I … I appreciate it. Have they found his …?”

_“Not yet. Caroline said he was in the old cellar, but he made her leave, and when she went back, he wasn’t there. She said it looked like a transformation, so he could have run out and …”_

“Oh, don’t.” Elena interrupted, cringing. The idea of Tyler dying alone in the cellar was bad enough, but the thought that his body was lying decomposing somewhere … “You can’t be overheard, can you?”

 _“Oh … Oh, yeah, half of Mystic Falls is eavesdropping.”_ Jeremy answered. _“C’mon, Elena, gimme some credit. Hang on.”_ His voice became slightly muffled. _“It’s Elena – get everyone out here.”_

“Jeremy …” Elena began.

 _“Elena, I know you need time; I get that, I do.”_ Jeremy insisted. _“But we all thought you were dead – we need to hear your voice, alright?”_

“Okay.” Elena agreed shakily.

 _“No one thinks any differently, Elena.”_ Jeremy added. _“We love you.”_

 _“Did Caroline hear you right?”_ Matt’s voice asked. _“It’s Elena?”_

_“Yeah. Here – talk to her. I’ll grab the others.”_

_“Elena?”_

“Hi Matt.” Elena greeted weakly. “Are you okay?”

He laughed weakly. _“Hey, you’re the one who died.”_

“Yeah, but I’m still here.” Elena said. “No harm, no foul, right?”

_“Elena, you’re a vampire, and it’s my fault.”_

“It is _not_ your fault.” Elena said fiercely. “I made the choice to stay in that car, Matt. And Meredith made the choice to use vampire blood to heal me. It’s not your fault, Matt. I’m just glad you’re okay.”

 _“Yeah …”_ Matt cleared his throat. _“And you’re alright? I mean, you’re coping with … things?”  
_

“I haven’t killed anyone.” Elena stated. “And neither has Damon. So things are doing okay, yeah.”

 _“Good. That’s good.”_ Matt said, sounding a little distracted. “ _Listen, Elena, I know things have been a little awkward between us over the last year or so, and for good reason, but I want to apologise for my part in it. You’re one of my oldest friends, and you were right when you broke up with me – we didn’t fit, and I should have realised that back then, rather than hanging on to something that wasn’t there. But … I love you, Elena. And,”_ he added quickly, _“I mean that in the most platonic sense of the word, I promise.”_

Elena laughed shakily. “I know. I love you too. All of you.”

 _“Speaking of all of us,”_ Matt said, _“you’re about to get passed around, okay? I’ll see you when you get back?”_

“Yeah.” Elena agreed softly. “See you.”

 _“Elena?”_ Now it was Bonnie’s voice that came from the phone, almost frantic. _“Are you okay?”_

Elena had never been so grateful for the support of a tree; her legs were almost shaking with anxiety. “I’m alright. Haven’t killed anyone, I promise.”

 _“Well, that’s a start. I’m working on a way to get you into sunlight.”_ Bonnie assured her. _“Give me a few more days, and I can have it ready for when you come home, rather than needing you there when I spell it.”_

“Thanks, Bonnie.” Elena whispered. “So you don’t hate me then?”

 _“Elena, sweetie, this wasn’t your fault!”_ Bonnie protested. _“And I could never hate you. Oh, and tell Damon that I haven’t told anyone what he asked me to research, but that the only solution is time and patience.”_

Elena frowned for a second. _What on earth …? Oh, he must have called about the sire bond._ “Okay, I’ll tell him. He warned me, don’t worry.”

 _“Well, I wish one of you would explain to us.”_ Caroline put in. _“When we told Bonnie about you, she went a hundred different shades of pale, but won’t tell us why.”_

Elena hesitated. “There’s a chance … a strong chance actually, that there’s a sire bond between me and Damon. We’re working on it.”

 _“Elena,”_ Stefan’s voice said urgently, sending her heart into a strange somersault routine, _“you know what a sire bond is, right?”_

“An intrinsic desire to make your sire happy.” Elena recited. “Which is why the first thing Damon did when he suspected it was tell me that the thing that would make him happiest would be if I didn’t do anything I didn’t want to do. Since I know it’s there, I’m aware of it, and I can get around it. Hang on.”

A crash from the house had caught her attention, and she quickly focused her hearing on that direction. Once she had made sure that the noise had been caused by Damon’s attempts to make dinner rather than an intruder or, more likely, Damon and Katherine finally trying to kill each other, she turned back to the conversation.

“Sorry. Wanted to make sure they weren’t killing each other.”

 _“They?”_ Bonnie asked.

“Yeah, Katherine’s here.” Elena said casually. “She’s been helping. Before any of you tell me I’m mental, I’m well aware, trust me. But she’s actually been acting … human.”

 _“The idea of Katherine teaching you tricks doesn’t exactly fill me with confidence, Elena.”_ Jeremy said bluntly.

Elena laughed. “And the idea of Damon teaching me does? Look, I know it’s Katherine and she’s done terrible things, but Damon’s done terrible things as well. I’ve given him a second chance – and a third, and a fourth, and a fifth – so why shouldn’t I give her one as well?”

 _“Just be careful, Elena.”_ Stefan warned. _“Katherine’s tricky.”_

“Believe me, Stefan, I know.” Elena said softly. “But she really hasn’t been that bad.” _And Damon wouldn’t let anything happen to me_. She added silently, but knew better than to say it aloud.

 _“Well,”_ Caroline said decisively, _“I need another drink – Matt, Jeremy, come help. See you when you get back, Elena.”_

 _“But we …”_ Jeremy protested, but stopped almost immediately. _“Right, helping. Coming, Bonnie?”_

_“Yeah, of course. See you later, Elena.”_

“Bye everyone.” Elena said softly. One voice hadn’t joined in with the goodbyes, and she waited until she heard the door to the Grill open and close, before speaking again. “I guess that was their way of giving us some privacy.”

 _“Guess so.”_ Stefan agreed quietly. _“How are you? Really?”_

Elena smiled slightly. “I’m fine, Stefan. Really. We’ve been working on my control – I can be around blood for over an hour without slipping now.”

 _“Well done, Elena – that’s fantastic.”_ Stefan said, his smile evident. _“And fast.”_

“Well, apparently, Katherine had a few tricks she failed to mention to you two back in 1864.” Elena informed him. “I’m amazed Damon hasn’t killed her yet.”

As though his brother’s name was a magic word, the easy atmosphere, even over the phone, vanished in a split second.

 _“Elena,”_ Stefan said seriously, _“we shouldn’t be doing this.”_

“Doing what?” Elena asked, sighing. “Talking? We’ve always been able to talk, Stefan, about anything. Why is it so awkward all of a sudden? And don’t you _dare_ say ‘Damon’,” she added fiercely, “because if you do, so help me God … He has _nothing_ to do with this.”

_“Except he’s got everything to do with it, Elena.”_

Elena sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. Was it even possible for vampires to get headaches? “You know what? I don’t have the energy to fight with you over this. I have told you, time and time again, that Damon and I are just friends; I can’t keep doing it. Call me when you’ve decided you can trust me again.”

Hanging up the phone, she pushed away from the tree and stalked back to the house, her previous good mood dissipating in a cloud of smoke.

Half of her hoped that the kitchen would be empty when she stepped inside, the other half hoped that Damon would be there.

Both sides were disappointed.

Katherine was seated at the island, reading something on her cell phone. “Dinner should be ready soon.” She said, glancing up. “What happened to you?”

“Weren’t you eavesdropping?” Elena asked tiredly, falling in to the chair opposite her.

Katherine tilted her head slightly. “No. I wasn’t, actually. I guessed you were calling your brother. What did he say?”

“It’s not Jeremy that’s the problem.” Elena muttered. “He was fine. So was Matt, and Bonnie, and Caroline.”

“What about the Lockwood guy?” Katherine asked. “Tyler, is it?”

Elena didn’t have the energy to glare at her. “He’s dead, Katherine. He was one of Klaus’s hybrids, remember?”

“Oh.” Katherine said quietly. “… So what happened with Stefan? Process of elimination.”

Elena sighed, glad that Katherine hadn’t pushed her to talk about Tyler. “He’s still convinced I have feelings for Damon.”

“For Damon?” Katherine repeated sharply. “Do you?”

“No.” Elena answered, looking at her curiously. “What happened to ‘it’s okay to love them both’?”

“I never believed you did.” Katherine said, shrugging. “I was messing with you. Have you told Stefan you don’t?”

“Yeah, but he doesn’t believe me.” Elena said, wiping her eyes hastily, feeling tears burning in them again. “I don’t blame him for _thinking_ it, you know? He was away, and the Ripper, and humanity-less, if that’s even a word. And Damon and I grew close, yeah, and we talked about it. And once we talked …”

“Any tension disappeared.” Katherine finished understandingly. “Probably overnight.”

“Right.” Elena agreed. “So I get why he thought it to start with; that’s not what’s pissing me off. It’s that I’m telling him there’s nothing between me and Damon, and he’s practically accusing me of lying to his face about it.”

Katherine frowned thoughtfully. “If you had to choose …”

“No.” Elena said, shaking her head. “Katherine, don’t …”

“Listen.” Katherine said firmly. “If you _had_ to choose between them, who would you pick?”

Elena closed her eyes, swallowing the lump that formed in her throat. “Stefan.” She said finally. “He’s my soul-mate, Katherine; I know he is.”

“Yeah.” Katherine murmured. “I can believe that.”

“But Damon’s my best friend.” Elena continued. “I can’t imagine never seeing him again … and that’s not the sire bond talking; I just can’t.”

“I can believe that too.” Katherine said, frowning. “Thing is, if you end up having to choose, you’ll end up resenting whichever one you choose for making you lose the other one.”

“Exactly.” Elena sighed, burying her face in her hands. “I hate this. When did everything get so complicated?”

“Stefan?” Damon asked quietly, stepping through from the living room.

Katherine nodded. “Still not buying the friendship thing.”

Damon scowled. “I guess Caroline’s not doing a very good job of convincing him otherwise.”

***

Back in Mystic Falls, Caroline was doing her best. She had been dropping gentle hints since Elena and Damon left town and, having eavesdropped on Stefan and Elena’s conversation, finally decided that enough was enough.

As they left the Grill and bid each other goodbye, she tucked her hand through Stefan’s arm and gave him a dazzling smile. “Walk me home?”

Stefan smiled back weakly. “Sure.”

It wasn’t late, but the streets of Mystic Falls were quiet nonetheless. For the first time in a long time, Caroline hoped her mother was working late, and her prayers were answered, when they reached her house to find the windows dark and the driveway empty, save for Caroline’s car.

As their pace slowed, Caroline sniffed. “Do you mind coming inside for a little while?” She asked. “I don’t want to be alone after …”

Stefan freed his arm from her hand and wrapped it around her shoulders. “I don’t blame you. I can stay as long as you need me.”

Caroline smiled tremulously. She was only half-acting now. Losing Tyler had left a gaping hole in her life, one she wasn’t sure she could ever fill.

She unlocked the front door, letting them into the house, and turned the lights on. They shed their coats and wandered into the living room, Caroline tucking herself under Stefan’s arm as they sat down.

“You want to talk about it?” Stefan asked softly.

“I miss him.” Caroline whispered. “I only just got him back, Stefan, and now he’s gone, and I’ll never see him again …”

Once she started, she couldn’t stop, and she was soon sobbing into his shoulder, while he stroked her hair and murmured meaningless words of comfort.

By the time her mom got home an hour later, Caroline’s tears had dried, and they were just holding each other in mutual comfort.

The sound of the key in the door broke them apart, and Stefan stood, stretching. “Are you gonna be okay?”

Caroline smiled weakly. “Yeah, I’ll be fine. Listen,” she caught his hand and used it to pull herself to her feet. “I just wanted to say … Okay, this is gonna sound ridiculously sentimental, so bear with me. I really appreciate everything you’ve done since I turned. So many people would have given up on me, but you didn’t. I really see you as my best friend, have for a while, and … I love you, I guess.”

Stefan returned her smile, despite the slight pang in his chest. She really did remind him of Lexi sometimes, just less … Lexi-like. “I know, Care. I love you too.”

“I’m home!” Liz called.

“Hi Mom.” Caroline greeted, as they entered the hallway. “Stefan was just …”

“Oh, you don’t have to leave on my account.” Liz told him with a smile. “Is everything alright?” She added, catching sight of the tear streaks on her daughter’s face.

“Yeah.” Caroline assured her with an easy smile. “It’s just been a long few days.”

“And I really do need to go.” Stefan added. “Thanks though.” He waited until Liz had walked into the kitchen, before drawing closer to Caroline. “She needs to know about Tyler.”

“I know.” Caroline sighed. “Telling Mom just makes it … real, I guess.”

Stefan nodded. “Yeah, I get it.” He kissed her forehead. “Call me if you need me.”

“I will.” Caroline agreed, opening the front door. She waited until he had reached the road, before saying, “Oh, Stefan?”

He turned to look at her.

Caroline smiled. “None of this means I’m in love with you.”

Stefan opened his mouth to respond, but the door had closed. He set off for the boarding house, thinking her words over.

Was he reading more into the way Elena and Damon looked at each other than he should be?

Was he really seeing things that weren’t there?

He didn’t think he was being unreasonable about the whole thing; he wasn’t playing the jealous boyfriend.

He didn’t have the right to, not after everything that had happened with Klaus.

His jaw clenched as he remembered everything that had happened. He could never blame Elena for falling out of love with him – he was amazed she was even still _talking_ to him.

He had hurt her, manipulated her, _fed from her_ …

He had been like Damon, like Damon at his _worst_ , because recently he was seeing more and more of the brother he remembered.

Even if Elena did still love him, she was also in love with Damon, and God knew they deserved a chance.

He had lost her, through his own choices, and now he had to live with that.

Pushing the door to the boarding house open, he had every intention to go to bed, but he was stopped by the soft glow of light coming from the library.

He was fairly sure he had turned off all of the lights before going out.

Or, rather, Caroline had turned off all the lights before dragging him out.

Stefan followed the light and stopped just inside the door. The woman leaning against the mantelpiece was partly expected and partly not.

At first glance, her presence was unsurprising, given the conversation they’d had on the phone – Elena was not one to just leave a situation hanging like that.

But in the next second, Stefan took in the languidness of her stance and the curled hair trailing over one shoulder. “Katherine.”

The corner of her lips twitched in a smirk, proving him right. “Hello Stefan.” She greeted.  Although she held herself with the same easy, almost seductive, grace she had always possessed, there was something in her eyes tonight that put him on edge, and her next words did nothing to assuage that. “We need to talk.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm thinking of continuing this past Elena's initial training, in which case I'll need a new title - any ideas?

The library of the Salvatore boarding house could never be considered small, but standing in the doorway, staring at Katherine, it suddenly felt uncomfortably so.

“We need to talk?” Stefan repeated. “‘We’ as in ‘you and me’?”

“And ‘talk’ as in ‘open our mouths and say words to form a conversation’.” Katherine said, smirking slightly. “Yes.”

“I’m not interested in anything you have to say.” Stefan said flatly, crossing the floor to Damon’s liquor stash.

Katherine sighed. “Look, Stefan, I’m not asking you for anything. I’ll talk, you’ll listen, I’ll leave. That’s it.”

“That’s it?” Stefan asked dubiously, pouring himself a glass.

“That’s it.” Katherine repeated.

Stefan grimaced. “Alright, fine.” He debated for a split second, and poured a second glass. “Then talk.”

Katherine accepted the glass with a smile, but stayed by the fireplace, keeping distance between them. “First of all, I want to assure you that I mean Elena no harm. I really do want to help her.”

“Why?” Stefan asked immediately. “What do you get out of it?”

Katherine frowned. “I’d be hurt by your assumption that I need to get something out of it, but you know me, so I won’t bother.”

“No games, Katherine.” Stefan said. “I’m not in the mood.”

Katherine took a sip of bourbon, contemplating her next move. She had learned from an early age that, if she didn’t put herself first, no one would, which was the underlying reason for her admittedly selfish behaviour.

But, at the same time, as long as it didn’t hurt her, Katherine would do almost anything for the people she cared about.

Not that there were many of those.

Caring about people got you killed, or got them killed, especially when Klaus was involved.

Her family was a perfect example of that.

It made you vulnerable.

Katherine did not like feeling vulnerable, which was why Damon still had no idea why she was helping Elena either.

For some reason, it was easier to tell Stefan than it was his brother.

“She’s family.” Katherine answered, shrugging. “Is it too much to believe that I care?”

“You tried to kill her, Katherine.” Stefan pointed out coldly.

Katherine rolled her eyes. “Not really. The only time I came close was when Lucy linked us, and I knew you’d stop when you realised Elena was in danger.”

“You handed her over to Klaus when you took him the moonstone.” Stefan said.

“I was trying to keep myself alive.” Katherine retorted. “By that point, there was no way she was going to escape it. That was never my plan, Stefan. My plan was to break the curse of the sun, thereby destroying the moonstone and the werewolves, meaning that Klaus could never become a hybrid. And before you say anything, the curse of the sun didn’t require Elena to be sacrificed. Just her blood, which could have been taken bit by bit.” She rolled her eyes, seeing that Stefan didn’t look convinced. “C’mon, Stefan, you and I both know that if I wanted Elena dead, she’d be dead.”

“Alright.” Stefan conceded. “Let’s say I believe you. What was your ‘second of all’?”

Katherine took a deep breath. This was the part she really didn’t want to do. “I want to apologise.”

Stefan stared at her. “You? Apologise?” He laughed. “Come off it, Katherine – what do you really want?”

“To apologise.” Katherine repeated, defensively. “I will never regret or apologise for anything I’ve done to keep myself alive, you’re right. But my intention was not and has never been to hurt you or Damon, and I did, so for that, yes, I’m sorry.”

Stefan shook his head. “Are you looking for forgiveness, Katherine?”

“No.” Katherine admitted. “I’m not. That’s not why I’m saying it. I’m saying it, because you need to hear it. Because you need to let go.”

“Do you know what it’s like?” Stefan demanded, rising to his feet. “Do you know what it’s like to love someone, only to realise it’s all a lie?”

“Not all of it.” Katherine protested. “I never compelled you to feel anything for me, Stefan – why would I?”

“Because you were in love with me.” Stefan answered, pacing behind the couch. “And now you’re trying to screw with my head again.”

“Stefan, the first time I compelled you was after you found out I was a vampire, right?” Katherine asked.

The question pulled Stefan up short and he frowned. “Yeah, why?”

“Stefan, my humanity was off.” Katherine admitted. “It had been off for three hundred years, and I didn’t turn it back on until after I first compelled you. If I didn’t feel anything for you – couldn’t feel anything for you – why would I compel you to love me? I compelled you not to be afraid of me. If you feel that’s the same thing, then I’m sorry for that, but I can’t go back in time and change my decision.”

Stefan crossed his arms. “What did you mean when you said I need to let go?”

“Elena’s not me, Stefan.” Katherine said softly. “When she says she’s in love with you … she means it.”

“You didn’t.” Stefan stated, rather than asked.

“No.” Katherine admitted. “I loved you, Stefan – part of me still does and always will – but I was never in love with you. Like I said, my humanity was off when we began, and when I turned it back on … I was too selfish to lose you. You were in love with me, and I didn’t want to lose you completely by telling you the truth.”

Stefan’s frown deepened. “It never occurred to you that if I knew what you were …?”

“No.” Katherine said honestly. “It didn’t. Maybe I didn’t want to think about it. I just knew I wanted you to stay in my life; that’s why I compelled you to drink my blood … But Elena’s not me.”

“I know that.” Stefan said stiffly. “You’ll notice I knew the difference between you when I walked in.”

Katherine smiled slightly. “That’s not what I mean. I mean that Elena is in love with you, not Damon. She wouldn’t lie to your face.”

“I never said she would!” Stefan protested. “It’s got nothing to do with not trusting her …”

“It has everything to do with not trusting her!” Katherine interrupted. “She’s saying she loves you, not Damon, and you don’t believe her. You don’t trust her to tell you the truth.”

Stefan gripped the back of the couch, his face white. “Oh God … I hadn’t thought about it from that angle.”

“Don’t lose what you have with Elena because I screwed up 146 years ago.” Katherine said firmly, finishing her drink. “She’s not me.”

“That’s it?” Stefan asked, as she walked to the door.

“That’s it.” Katherine confirmed, turning to face him. “I told you – I’ll talk, you’ll listen, I’ll leave. I didn’t apologise for forgiveness, Stefan. I don’t deserve it. Although, while we’re on the subject, do you think you’ll ever be able to?”

Stefan was silent for a few minutes. “Ask me in another 150 years.” He said finally.

Katherine smirked. “It’s a date.”

And then she was gone. And he was alone.

***

The following evening, Katherine breezed into the living room, where Elena was reading a book, and dropped an outfit on her lap. “Get changed.” She said. “We’re going out.”

“Excuse me?” Elena asked.

“We’re going out.” Katherine repeated. “We can’t teach you to hunt here; there’s no prey.”

“So where are we going?” Elena asked warily.

“Nearest town.” Katherine answered. “Not Mystic Falls, don’t worry. It’s just a little place I know.”

‘Little place’ turned out to be an understatement, and Elena found herself outside a nightclub, revellers spilling out onto the street, the music turned up so loud she was surprised the building itself wasn’t pulsing with the beat.

“Here?” She asked dubiously.

“Of course.” Katherine answered. “It’s perfect.”

“Best place to hunt is in the middle of a crowd.” Damon agreed. “Come on, Elena; according to Bonnie and Caroline, you used to love places like this.”

“I’m not that person anymore.” Elena muttered, as the bouncer stepped in front of them.

“You’ve already checked ours.” Katherine told him with a smile, and he stepped back again to let them in.

“Right, here’s what you need to do.” Damon said, drawing Elena closer. “First, pick a target. You’re better off with a woman or a guy on his own, because they don’t have people clambering for details after they get back. Compel them to follow you somewhere private, and then do exactly what you did last night. Got it?”

“I haven’t fed since this morning.” Elena said shakily. “Maybe …”

“That’s the point, Elena.” Katherine said, rolling her eyes. “But it does mean one person won’t cut it. You’ll have to drink from at least …”

“Actually,” Damon interrupted, “let’s not tell her. See if she can figure it out. We won’t let you overdo it.” He assured Elena. “Call it an impromptu test.”

“I’ll come with you for the first one, if you want.” Katherine offered.

Elena nodded jerkily. “That’d make me feel better.”

“Come on then.” Katherine grabbed her hand and pulled her into the crowd, leaving Damon standing by the bar.

“Twins.” The bartender said, almost dreamily. “Dude.”

Damon rolled his eyes. “Shut up.”

***

Nearly an hour later, Katherine reappeared at Damon’s side. “She’s on number four.” She informed him.

“I know.” Damon said. “I’ve been watching. Three more, and we step in.”

“Four more.” Katherine corrected. “We both fed from number two. She’ll need an extra.” She smirked. “You were watching us?”

“Stefan would kill me if I let Elena get hurt.” Damon said, ignoring the hand that ran up his arm.

“Right.” Katherine drawled. “Dance with me?”

“Last time you and I danced, it was a waltz.” Damon remarked, catching her waist and holding her still. “And my brother’s the better dancer, remember?”

Katherine pouted. “Come on, Damon. Just one for old times’ sake?”

“Trouble with that, Katherine, is that since those ‘old times’, you’ve tried to kill me.” Damon said darkly. “Remember? Frankly, you’re lucky I haven’t staked you.”

Katherine’s hands rested on his chest. “There are two sides to every story, Damon.” She whispered, her lips millimetres from his. “And we both know you won’t.”

“Don’t,” Damon said, his hand tangling in her hair and pulling her back, putting distance between them, “count on it.”

Katherine didn’t flinch, despite his tight grip on her hair. “Think what you like, Damon.”

“As can you.” Damon retorted. “But as soon as Elena has this sorted, we’re going back to Mystic Falls and I never want to see you again. Clear?”

“Crystal.” Katherine responded coolly. “But that’ll be difficult, Damon, seeing as Elena and I share a face.”

“Done it.” Elena announced, appearing beside them. “Am I interrupting something?”

“Nothing.” Katherine said, turning to her. “Done what?”

“Eight people.” Elena elaborated. “I fed from eight people. That was the number, right? Because I don’t think I need anymore. Actually, that last one felt like too much, so I stopped early.”

Argument forgotten, Damon and Katherine stared at her in surprise.

“Yes.” Damon said after several minutes, realising Elena had asked a question. “Yes, eight was the number.” A smile spread across his face. “Well done, Lena.”

“I suggest we go back to the lake house and get something to eat.” Katherine said, also smiling. “We can make our way home tomorrow.”

“Okay.” Elena said cheerfully, making her way towards the doors.

Damon caught Katherine’s arm. “I meant what I said.”

Katherine pulled her arm from his grip. “I know.”

***

“You know, Elena, you did really well tonight.” Katherine said, as she began clearing the dishes away.

Elena smiled. “But?”

“But nothing.” Katherine insisted, squeezing her shoulder as she passed. “You did really well. I’m proud of you.”

“Careful, Kat.” Damon said. “Your humanity’s showing.”

Katherine rolled her eyes. “Don’t call me that, Damon. It’s weird when you call me that.”

“Stefan called you that.” Damon pointed out.

“That’s why it’s weird.” Katherine called back from the kitchen.

“Stefan called her ‘Kat’?” Elena asked.

Damon nodded. “Yeah, it was his pet-name for her, so to speak.”

Elena shook her head. “How many pet-names did he give her?”

“Just that one.” Katherine answered, leaving the kitchen. “Why?”

Elena frowned. “Who called you ‘angel’ then?”

Damon snorted. “That was me. Although how you knew …”

Katherine stared at Elena quizzically for a few seconds, before her own words came flying back to her. _“I fell in love … I wanted to be his angel for eternity.”_

Elena, for her part, was looking from Katherine to Damon, with an expression of realisation dawning on her face. “I …”

“Elena, outside, now!” Katherine said firmly, grabbing Elena’s hand and dragging her through the kitchen.

“I knew it!” Elena burst out, as soon as they reached the back yard. “I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!”

“You don’t know anything.” Katherine insisted. “You’re assuming …”

“It makes no sense that you’d go after Stefan when you got back to Mystic Falls, knowing that Klaus could use him to get to you.” Elena said, cutting her off. “In the tomb, you told me that you couldn’t condemn the man you were in love with to eternity without his brother, so you took desperate measures. There’s nothing desperate about Damon willingly drinking your blood – you were talking about compelling Stefan. You had no idea the dagger would kill Damon; you lied to him. You told Stefan that Damon was in danger, which is why he saved Klaus. And you told me that you wanted to be ‘his angel’ for eternity, that’s why you turned him – admit it, Katherine …”

“Alright, I lied!” Katherine said with a huff. “I knew that Klaus would do anything to get to me, so I lied to Damon. I spent 145 years making sure he was safe; I wasn’t going to screw that up by being selfish again. You’re right. I never loved Stefan. It was always Damon ...” She trailed off, closing her eyes. “And he’s standing right behind me, isn’t he?”

“Yes.” Damon answered from the back door. “He is.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that the Curse of the Sun was a myth, but I can't remember if Katherine ever found out. If she did, chalk it up to AU.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's where the romance kicks in, folks - if you didn't read the AN at the beginning of chapter 1, that's Stelena and Datherine, so no flames please.  
> Warning for some strong language (alright, one word).

For a few seconds, the three of them stood in silence. Then Elena cleared her throat.

“I didn’t know he was there.” She said awkwardly. “I’d have …”

“Yeah.” Katherine said stiffly. “I know.”

“I’ll … I’ll leave you two to talk.” Elena said slowly, hurrying back inside, closing the door behind her, resisting the urge to eavesdrop.

Once safely ensconced in the kitchen, Elena let go of the breath she was holding, almost doubling over as she did.

She had had her suspicions for months, but never did she think that Katherine would just admit it like that.

The front door open and closed, and she stiffened, allowing her fangs to extend again. She wasn’t as self-conscious about her vampire features now, and they were the best weapon she had.

_“Just push off with your best foot as hard as you can.”_

In a split-second, Elena had blurred into the hallway and pinned the intruder against the wall. “What do …?” She trailed off, loosening her grip, her face relaxing. “Stefan?”

“Elena.” Stefan greeted weakly. “We need to talk.”

Elena let go of him and stepped back, even as her body screamed for contact. “Yeah. Yeah, we do.”

***

Katherine still hadn’t turned around. She wasn’t planning to, either.

The best thing for her to do was run.

Her body tensed, but Damon’s hand closed around her arm before she could take so much as a step. “Don’t you dare.”

Katherine lifted her head and looked back at him. “I thought you wanted me to leave.”

“I want the truth, Katherine!” Damon snapped. “After everything, you owe me that much.”

Katherine took a deep breath. “You’re right. I do owe you that.”

“Good, then …” Damon trailed off, listening intently.

Katherine did the same, hearing Stefan’s voice in the house.

“Come on.” Damon said, leading her back inside. “I need to talk to Stefan before he puts his foot in it again.” His grip on her arm didn’t loosen until they found Stefan and Elena standing in the living room. “Kitchen, brother.” He said tersely. “We need to talk.”

“I am getting so sick of those four words.” Elena said, rolling her eyes. “Damon, don’t you think Stefan and I need to talk?”

“Yeah, you do.” Damon said, handing Katherine into one of the chairs. “Don’t move.” He looked at Stefan. “Kitchen.”

Stefan sighed, looking at Elena. “Do you mind?”

Elena waved a hand, perching on the arm of Katherine’s chair. “Go on. It’s probably a good idea.”

Stefan nodded, following Damon through into the kitchen. As soon as the adjoining door was closed, he found himself pinned against it, Damon’s hand around his throat.

“If you ever make Elena cry again,” his brother hissed, “I will go back to making your eternity hell.”

“Implies you stopped.” Stefan choked out. “And I’m not going to.” He finally managed to shove Damon off him. “I’m not going to.” He repeated.

“Good.” Damon said. “I’m not in love with her, Stefan. I never was. Even if I was, she’s not in love with me.”

“I know.” Stefan said, staring at a point over his head. “I know that now.  I was being an idiot. I was projecting after what happened with Katherine … and I didn’t even realise it until she pointed it out to me.”

“Katherine?” Damon asked, distracted. “What did she have to do with it?”

“Turned up at the boarding house last night and apologised for hurting me back in 1864.” Stefan said with a shrug. “Said that it was never her intention … and, honestly, Damon, I believe her.”

Damon glanced at the door as though hoping he could see through it and into Katherine’s head. “She’s up to something.”

“Or she just doesn’t need to run anymore.” Stefan said, but he was frowning. “Although I’m more inclined to agree with you.” He folded his arms. “You just drag me in here for a heart-to-heart about Elena?”

“No.” Damon cleared his throat. “I … I wanted to …”

Stefan raised an eyebrow. “I think this is the first time I’ve seen you lost for words.”

Damon sighed. “Oh, screw it. I’m sorry, alright?”

Stefan’s arms dropped to his side. “You’re what?”

Damon scowled at him. “Don’t make me say it again.”

“What, exactly, are you apologising for?” Stefan asked slowly.

Damon rolled his eyes. “Everything. But if you’re looking for a specific … Lexi.”

“Lexi?” Stefan repeated. “You already …”

“No, I didn’t.” Damon said. “We both know that was a load of crap.”

“Why now?” Stefan asked weakly.

“Because she was your best friend, and she’s dead.” Damon answered, staring at the floor. “Because of me. When I thought Elena was dead … And she’s only been in my life for a year, you had Lexi for over a hundred. I know I said I promised you an eternity of misery, but …”

Stefan’s hand landed on his shoulder. “Stop. I know why you killed her. And I still can’t forgive it, Damon – I don’t know if I ever can. But I’ve forgiven _you_. You’re my brother – and the eternity of misery was my fault in the first place …”

“The hell it was.” Damon interrupted. “Yeah, you made me turn and, yeah, I was pissed at you, but I should’ve realised why you did it. You’re my little brother, I’d always looked out for you, and that changed – God knows why …”

“Katherine.” Stefan put in darkly.

“Yeah.” Damon muttered, knowing he had one hell of a discussion coming. “I guess what I’m trying to say, Stefan, is that I want to start over. Give that brother thing another shot.” He held out a hand, smirking. “After all, we did it oh-so-well once upon a time.”

Stefan cracked a smile, remembering his ‘impression’ of Damon months ago, and clasped his brother’s hand. “I think we were already doing that.”

Damon shrugged. “Probably.” He hesitated for a split-second, but Stefan beat him to it, pulling him into a manly hug for the first time in over a century.

They released each other with no embarrassment, clapping each other’s shoulders. No more words were exchanged, unneeded by a bond that had never really broken over time, even if their relationship had.

Stefan pulled open the door to the living room to find Elena where they’d left her, talking quietly to Katherine. “Elena?”

She looked up with a smile, but he could see the trepidation in her eyes.

Stefan held out his hand. “Would you take a walk with me?”

“Of course.” Elena answered, rising to her feet and taking his hand. Their fingers automatically entwined, remembering the other’s grip after so long apart.

Hand in hand, they left the house, leaving Katherine and Damon alone in the living room.

“You’re not going to run again.” Damon stated.

“No, I’m not.” Katherine agreed, standing. “I agreed that I owe you the truth, and that’s exactly what you’ll get.” She took a deep breath. “My humanity was off when I met you. To start with, I didn’t care what I did, who I hurt. It had been off for three hundred years, and I wasn’t about to start feeling again … but you got under my skin and into my head and into my heart, and before I knew what was happening, I’d fallen in love with you, and I’d flipped the switch.”

“And Stefan?” Damon asked, approaching her.

His approach was slow, predatory, and she backed up at the same pace. “I loved him, Damon. I cared about him. Much like Elena cares about you. I was too selfish to lose him, so I pretended I loved him like he loved me.”

“You turned him.” Damon pointed out.

“I didn’t want to lose him.” Katherine repeated. “And I could never condemn you to an eternity without your brother.”

Damon snorted. “That backfired, didn’t it?”

Katherine’s eyes flashed. “You can blame me for a lot, Damon, but not that. I did not make you turn your back on him.”

In a blur of movement, her back collided with the wall and his face was inches from hers. “Do you know _why_ I turned my back on him, Katherine?” He didn’t wait for an answer. “Because he made me transition.”

“He made you …” Katherine stared at him in confusion. “But … you wanted to turn, Damon.”

“Because I wanted to be with you!” Damon bit out. “I thought you were _dead_ , Katherine; I couldn’t fathom life without you, I wanted to _die_!” He lowered his voice. “Do go on, Katherine. You were about to tell me why you faked your death and didn’t bother telling me.”

“Klaus would have killed you.” Katherine whispered, her face deathly-white. “I was being selfish – so selfish – I was dragging you into a fight you couldn’t hope to win and … I was trying to protect you, Damon. That’s why I lied when I came back to Mystic Falls.”

“So why not say all this five days ago?” Damon asked. “Klaus has gone now. We’re both safe.”

“I …” Katherine closed her eyes. “It’s going to sound selfish.”

Damon let out a bark of laughter. “That’s to be expected with you, sweetheart.” The endearment sounded bitter and sarcastic, and she flinched at the sound.

“I’m scared.” She confessed, almost inaudibly if it weren’t for his vampire senses. “I’m scared of making myself vulnerable …”

“Of getting hurt.” Damon finished softly. “Did it ever occur to you,” he murmured, running a finger down her cheek, “that you ripped my heart out without a second thought earlier this year?”

“Yes.” Katherine muttered. “That’s why I’m scared. That’s the other reason I didn’t tell you. You deserve closure, you deserve _better_. I wasn’t going to say anything – help Elena and then disappear, and you’d never have to deal with me again.” She lifted her head with more confidence than she felt. “But now you know.”

“Yes, I do.” Damon said darkly. “I should walk away. Let you go. Make you leave, tell you I never want to see you again. Trusting you, Katherine, is like handling a grenade; you never know when it’s gonna blow up in your face.” He sighed, resting his forehead against hers. “But I can’t. I never stopped loving you, Katherine.”

She lifted her hand, but before she could touch him, he pulled away.

“So here’s what we’re going to do.” He said firmly. “I’m going to go upstairs, and you are going to make a choice. If you leave, I will pretend this conversation never happened. I won’t use it against you. But I never want to see you again. If you stay and follow me, I will do what I said I would do when you first came back to Mystic Falls. I’ll forget everything that’s happened, all the years I spent searching for you, all the betrayal – everything. But you will have to understand, Katherine, that I don’t do things by halves. If you stay, you are mine for eternity, because I _don’t let go_.”

Katherine didn’t move as he left the room and went upstairs. She wasn’t sure her legs would support her just yet.

She knew that Damon thought he had changed since becoming a vampire, but she didn’t. The man he was now had always been there, hidden behind the sweet, innocent boy she’d fallen in love with. In 1864, he didn’t appear much, now he was a constant presence.

He had given her a gift – the gift of choice – but there was none.

Katherine Pierce was sick and tired of running.

Steadying herself, she followed his path up the stairs to his bedroom, her undead heart pounding with each step.

The room was empty when she walked in, and she frowned slightly, wondering if she had misjudged his destination.

Then the door clicked shut behind her and she felt his hand run down her spine. His touch sent shivers running through her, and her head fell back, resting on his shoulder as his hard body pressed against hers.

“You, of all people, should know the foolishness of baring your neck to a vampire.” Damon murmured, his breath ghosting over her skin.

Katherine’s stomach clenched, and she reluctantly stepped away, turning to face him. His eyes seemed sharper than ever, boring into hers, and she swallowed hard. “Do you remember the night I first fed from you?” She asked huskily.

Damon tilted his head slightly. “How could I forget?”

“You began to say that I wasn’t truly yours.” Katherine continued. “I was.” She said, before he could respond. “I am.” She swept her hair from her neck and tilted her head back, in a gesture of trust that scared her, even as she did it. “I always will be.”

Damon rested his hands on his waist, hesitating over her for just a second, before his fangs sunk into her skin.

Katherine’s legs buckled almost immediately, Damon’s arm snaking around her waist to keep her upright. She had been fed from before as a vampire, but it hadn’t felt like this, and she had dismissed Pearl’s stories about blood-sharing being intimately personal as romanticised myth.

There was nothing mythical about this.

He pulled away, her blood coating his lips, gasping for breath. “Guess the rumours about blood-sharing are true.”

“Guess so.” Katherine whispered, her eyes lingering on his lips, feeling the wound on her neck close over.

Damon took her face in his hands, his eyes searching hers. “Say it, Katherine. I need to hear it.”

Katherine smiled slightly. “Damon Salvatore, I am completely in love with you.”

“It’s about fucking time.” Damon muttered, his mouth crashing onto hers.

***

Outside, Stefan and Elena were walking in silence. His hand still gripped hers, and she took comfort in that. His touch seemed to burn through her, her nerves tingling, and she forced her mind to stay clear.

No matter how good it felt to have him touch her again, even as innocently as this, they needed to talk before anything else.

“Where are we going?” She asked, breaking the silence.

Stefan smiled slightly. “Just a little further.”

Sure enough, a few minutes later, they stepped into a clearing in the trees, a small stream bubbling through it, leading to the lake.

Lit by the stars and moonlight, it was one of the most beautiful sights Elena had ever seen. “Wow …”

“I found it by accident when I was fifteen.” Stefan said quietly. “Father brought me out here to teach me how to hunt and fish … and pretend that Damon wasn’t at war.” He turned to her. “But that’s not why we’re here.”

“No, it’s not.” Elena agreed, releasing his hand reluctantly. “Stefan …”

“Before you say anything,” Stefan interrupted, “I want to apologise.”

Elena was a little surprised, but acquiesced. “Alright.”

“I’m sorry, Elena.” Stefan said. “I’m sorry everything I’ve done to hurt you, I’m sorry for everything the _Ripper_ did to hurt you. I’m sorry for blinding myself to everything on some half-cocked quest for revenge. I’m sorry for not trusting you.”

“Why didn’t you?” Elena asked. “I can understand why you’d think something was going on, or that my feelings had changed, Stefan, but why would I lie to you about it?”  
Stefan sighed. “I know it sounds stupid, Elena, but I never made that connection. I _know_ you’d never lie to me, which should make things easier, but I never connected the fact that, for you to be in love with Damon, you’d have to be lying about it.”

“Why were you so convinced I was then?” Elena demanded, her heart pounding. “I mean, I want to believe it was because you felt guilty about everything and were trying to push me into Damon’s arms to make me happy, or to punish yourself, or both, but I’m starting to wonder if it’s just because you weren’t lying and you don’t love me anymore, so …”

His mouth cut her off, pressing against hers urgently, and she responded immediately, threading her fingers into his hair. His hands grasped her waist, pulling her closer, and she whimpered slightly as his lips left hers.

“Elena Gilbert,” he said seriously, “I am so in love with you. You’re right. It was guilt. I don’t deserve your love after everything I’ve done …”

“It’s not your place to make that decision for me!” Elena retorted. “That’s _my_ decision and _my_ choice. You’ve always let me make my own decisions, Stefan – don’t stop now. Not about something like this.” She rested her forehead against his. “Stefan, I love you.”

“You shouldn’t.” Stefan whispered.

“No, I shouldn’t.” Elena conceded. “I tried not to; I really did. Hanging on … it hurt so much, and I wanted to stop. But I couldn’t, Stefan, I couldn’t stop loving you and … Honestly, I’m so glad I didn’t.” She smiled, her eyes bright with unshed tears. “I knew you’d come back.”

Stefan’s smile matched hers and he brushed a kiss against her forehead. “I’m never leaving again, Elena. Living without you …”

“I know.” Elena whispered, catching his lips in another hungry kiss. Her emotions seemed to be on some kind of rollercoaster, which she had been assured was normal, but wasn’t easy to deal with.

Her back collided with one of the trees, eliciting a deep moan as Stefan’s body pressed against hers, and she arched into his touch. It had been so long, _too long_ , since they had been together.

Stefan broke the embrace first, holding her at arms’ length. “Wait.” He said breathlessly. “Brief pause while I have the control.”

“I don’t mind you losing control.” Elena said suggestively. “In fact, I’d prefer it.”

Stefan chuckled. “In a minute, sweetheart. I have something from Bonnie.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a silver ring, embedded with a midnight blue lapis stone.

“A daylight ring?” Elena breathed. “She said days.”

“She should give herself more credit.” Stefan said. “May I?”

Elena nodded, holding out her right hand, and he slipped it on to her finger. “It’s beautiful.”

“Yeah, it is.” Stefan agreed. “Never dreamed it’d be used for this though.”

“What do you mean?” Elena asked, her heart racing.

“I bought this for you months ago.” Stefan admitted. “After the sacrifice, before the funeral … before I found out about Damon’s bite.  Then Damon was dying, and I needed to save him, and I didn’t give it to you, because I think part of me knew that I wasn’t coming back – at least not for a while – and I didn’t want it to be a lie.”

“What was it for?” Elena asked. “Obviously not a daylight ring, given what you just said.”

“No.” Stefan took her hand, running a thumb across the ring. “That it was the right kind of stone was a coincidence. Incredible, really; woman in the store had no idea what it was. I won’t lie and say that it didn’t cross my mind that one day it could be used for that, but … you’d  made your feelings on the subject quite clear – not that I blame you.”

Elena sighed. “Stefan … I didn’t want to be a vampire. You are the only reason I would ever even consider it. Standing there before the sacrifice and saying ‘I don’t want to be a vampire; I never did’ does not mean that one day in the future I wouldn’t feel differently.” She took a deep breath. “But what’s done is done. There’s no point standing here and saying that it’s not my choice, and it wasn’t what I wanted, and I’m not supposed to be this way.” She gave him a meaningful look. “Especially when that can be taken so many ways.”

Stefan lifted her hand to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to the back. “I meant that you didn’t want to be this way.”

“I realise that now.” Elena said. “That’s not how I took it at the time.” She lowered her gaze. “I took it to mean that you didn’t want me like this.”

Stefan tilted her face up to meet his gaze. “I’m sorry, Elena. I never stopped to think about how it sounded to you, especially that recently turned. Your emotions end up all over the place.”

“Tell me about it.” Elena muttered. “So what _was_ it for?”

Stefan smiled. “A promise.”

“A promise of what?” Elena pressed.

Stefan shrugged. “Whatever you want. It can still be that. What do you want me to promise?”

Elena didn’t need to think very hard. “The only thing that will make vampirism bearable.”

“And what’s that?” Stefan asked.

“You.” Elena answered. “I want eternity, Stefan, but I want it with you.”

Stefan pulled her into his arms, kissing her deeply, and she melted into his embrace. This time when the kiss broke, it was so he could kiss his way along her jawline to her ear. “I’m yours for as long as you want me.” He whispered, his fingers gripping her hips. “I know Damon’s your best friend, and I just want you to know that I’m absolutely fine with it.”

“I appreciate that.” Elena’s hand fisted in his collar. “But do you really think I want to talk about Damon right now?”

Stefan chuckled against her skin, pinning her back against the tree. “No.”

Elena wrapped her arms around his neck. “Smart man.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From here, I'm pretty much winging it. I don't have an end point in sight, so to speak, so it'll just keep going until I find a natural conclusion. Any suggestions for a different title would be appreciated.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've decided that this will be the last chapter of 'Transition', although there will hopefully be a sequel!

“I never tried to kill you.”

Katherine’s words, though quiet, seemed to echo in the silent room.

“I could make a list.” Damon said drowsily, stroking her hair.

They were both fairly relaxed now, lying in each other’s arms, her body melding against his as though she’d never been away.

“Go on then.” Katherine challenged, without any real heat. “1864 doesn’t count – you wanted me to turn you.”

“Yeah, about that.” Damon said, looking down at her. “Why turn us if you were going to run?”

“I wasn’t planning on running.” Katherine admitted. “Not until Klaus sent me that dream …”

“He warned you?” Damon asked.

“We’re predators, Damon.” Katherine reminded him. “We live for the hunt; it’s often as exciting as the kill.”

“That sounds familiar.” Damon muttered. “I’m fairly sure Stefan said those exact words to Elena once.”

“Oh, so he did listen.” Katherine remarked. “Good to know. Looking back, I don’t think Klaus was planning on catching me any time soon. He just wanted to watch me run scared.”

“He was tormenting you.” Damon concluded darkly. “Wait, that dream wasn’t the one Elena got dragged into the other morning, was it?”

Katherine nodded, turning her face into his bare chest. “It haunted me … seeing you like that … I knew I had to leave you behind, where you’d be safe and where you could live, and grow up, and find someone who wasn’t going to drag you across the globe on a wild goose chase.”

Damon sighed. “I wish you’d told me all this back then, Katherine.” He murmured into her hair. “I would have run anywhere with you.”

“I know.” Katherine whispered. “I … I wasn’t expecting you to die for me.” She felt Damon stiffen against her. “But I should have been.”

“For God’s sake, Katherine,” Damon sighed, “what part of ‘I love you’ didn’t you understand?”

“Damon, you have to understand that I live my life the way I do, because I learned from a very early age that if I didn’t put myself first, no one would.” Katherine said bluntly. “That had always been my reality, and it’s one that you understand, because that’s how you live your life as well.”

Damon stroked her hair rhythmically, thinking about what she’d said. “You’re right.” He said finally. “I do think like that. But I shouldn’t. We shouldn’t.”

“No.” Katherine agreed. “But we do. Anyway, you were about to list the times I tried to kill you.”

“Mason.” Damon complied.

“Mason.” Katherine repeated. “Not me. I told him to distract you, _not_ kill you.”

“Dagger.” Damon said.

Katherine sighed. “Another lie, I’m afraid. You can ask Elena – she confronted me before you did. I had no idea what that dagger did, Damon, I swear.”

“Then why did you say it did?” Damon asked, bewildered.

“It’s going to sound …”

“Selfish.” Damon finished.

“Stupid.” Katherine corrected. “And a bit selfish, yes. Elena asked me if I knew what the dagger did … you just assumed I knew. It … It hurt that you thought I’d just let you die.”

“So you lied to hurt me?” Damon concluded.

“Yes.” Katherine admitted softly. “I lied a _lot_ while I was there. Everything about John and Isobel was true, but … they threatened you, not Stefan.”

“All to protect yourself.” Damon finished with a sigh. “I get it, Katherine, but …”

“I know.” Katherine interrupted. “Believe me, I know, Damon. Do you think you can ever forgive me?”

“I said I would.” Damon answered.

Katherine grimaced. “I know what you said, Damon. But it’s not gonna be that easy, and it shouldn’t be that easy for you to just forgive and forget.”

“I didn’t say forget, Katherine.” Damon said seriously. “I don’t think I’ll ever forget. And you’re right – it’s going to take time to fully trust you again. But we have time. That’s the beauty of eternity, remember?”

Katherine let out a contented sigh. “I love you.”

Damon tilted her face up to kiss her lips. “I love you too, Katherine.”

***

Out by the stream, Stefan was leaning against one of the trees, Elena curled up in his lap. So far, they had only moved to put their clothes back on, before resuming their quiet embrace. “You said you had control down?”

Elena nodded, tracing patterns on his sleeve. “Damon and Katherine took me hunting tonight.”

She felt him stiffen, even as he asked, “Yeah? What did you think?”

Elena pulled a face. “I didn’t like it. I mean, the rush of the hunt … I loved that, though it pains me to admit it …”

“It’s okay to admit it, Elena.” Stefan said softly. “You’re a vampire; it’s in your nature.”

“But I hated feeding from people.” Elena finished, shuddering. “To have their life in my hands … it makes me uncomfortable, because I feel like I could wind up loving that, and I don’t want to.”

Stefan smiled, stroking her hair. “You are … You are one of the strongest people, Elena. And I truly believe that you can fight that.”

Elena smiled as well, nestling into him. “I don’t think I’ve ever appreciated the fight you face every day more than I do now. And I thought I got it.”

“Hey, it’s not something most people experience.” Stefan said. “You understood more than most … and it wasn’t something I ever _wanted_ you to completely understand it. But if there’s anyone who can handle it … it’s you.”

Elena’s smile widened. His faith in her was, perhaps, unsurprising, but hearing it still felt wonderful.

“You going the Caroline route then?” Stefan asked. “Blood bags.”

“Maybe.” Elena answered slowly. “I want to try animals as well.”

“You haven’t yet?” Stefan asked, sounding surprised.

Elena laughed. “Can you see Damon stalking bunnies?” He laughed as well, before she sobered. “Actually, I didn’t ask him. I … I wanted you to. If you …”

“Of course.” Stefan said, before she could finish. “Say the word, Lena.”

Elena stretched. “Not yet. I don’t think I can move.”

“Well, we should probably head back inside.” Stefan said, scooping her into his arms and standing up.

“Best make sure Damon and Katherine have … finished.” Elena warned, not arguing with his actions, unwilling to leave his arms just yet.

“Finished what?” Stefan asked. “What did I miss?”

“Oh, nothing much.”  Elena said airily. “Katherine growing a heart, admitting her undying love for Damon … not much.” She hastily locked her arms around his neck as he almost dropped her in shock.

“She did what?” Stefan asked. “I know she finally admitted that she was never in love with _me_ , but she’s trying it with Damon now?”

“Thing is, Stefan, I believe her.” Elena admitted. “I’ve had my suspicions for a while, and … I don’t think she’s lying. I just have a … I just have a feeling.”

“Well, your feelings are generally quite good.” Stefan conceded, carrying her back towards the house. “Still begs the question – what have they finished?”

“Depends on whether _he_ believes her.” Elena answered.

They reached the lake house a few minutes later, letting themselves in through the kitchen.

“Well, there’s no bloodshed in the living room.” Stefan whispered.

Elena listened hard, just catching Damon’s voice above them.

_“I love you too, Katherine.”_

“Yeah, he believes her.” She murmured, taking Stefan’s hand.

“If she’s playing him …” Stefan began.

“We’ll rip her heart out.” Elena finished. “Right behind you. But I really don’t think she is, Stefan. Besides, if she is, Damon will beat us to it.”

“That’s true.” Stefan conceded, as they made their way upstairs. “I guess you’ve been staying in my room?”

“Your mum’s.” Elena corrected. “Wasn’t sure you’d want me in yours. Damon said she wouldn’t mind.”

“She wouldn’t.” Stefan agreed immediately. “And he’d know.” He stopped outside his bedroom door. “You’re staying with me tonight though, right?”

Elena smiled. “Absolutely.”

***

Back in Mystic Falls, Caroline was also out. Her mother was working the night shift, so she was supposed to be home alone, but the house had seemed constricting all of a sudden, so she had laced on her running shoes and pounded the pavement until the rhythm of her steps almost drowned out all of the thoughts racing themselves through her heads.

She ran to the boarding house, but a quick glance told her that no one was home, and she could only hope that Stefan had found Elena, Damon and Katherine, as he had said he was going to.

Caroline hated the fact that Katherine was anywhere near Elena, although she had just about come to terms with the fact that Katherine had killed her.

Her path led her away from the boarding house and through the woods. If she was human, she would never run this way on her own, especially not late at night, but there wasn’t much in the forest that could hurt her – or even catch her. Even if she wasn’t using her supernatural speed at the moment, that could change very quickly.

She had no idea how far she’d run when the sensation hit her.

She was being watched.

Slowing to a halt, Caroline turned in a slow circle, her muscles tensing in anticipation. “Hello?”

“Caroline …”

The voice came from behind her, sending a shiver down her spine, and Caroline spun around to see Tyler emerging from behind one of the trees.

“Tyler …” She moved forwards slowly, almost in a dream. “Tyler …”

Tyler smiled softly at her. “I’m harder to kill than you think.”

“Oh God, you’re alive!” Blurring forwards, Caroline threw herself into his arms, kissing him deeply. “Thank God, thank God! I thought I’d never see you again!”

Tyler caught her hands as she backed him into a tree. “Easy, love. Wrong time, wrong place. Wrong equipment.”

“What’s wrong about it?” Caroline asked breathlessly, tearing his shirt open. “You’re alive, I’m alive …” His words flew into her like a missile and she released him, taking several steps back. “Did you just call me ‘love’?”

Tyler smirked, but it wasn’t the warm, slightly arrogant smirk she had become accustomed to. This was cold and calculating and … terrifyingly familiar. “Hello sweetheart.”

Caroline stumbled back until she collided with another tree. “Klaus …”


	10. Sequel!

The sequel to this story - Truce - has now been posted!


	11. Chapter 11

Just to let you know, the first chapter of this story has been revised, because that's the way my mind works. I realise it's the last thing I should be doing. And, yes, I will get Transfusion up and running again soon.


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